Same old ache, same damn hurt. Feel it still when I put you first. Prioritize what you feel inside, Rather than the needs I push aside. You say, "I don't wanna fight." You say, "You're the reason for my life." But then you tear it all back down, Let me crumple to the ground. That line, where you typed "I miss you" I read it with my hand held against my mouth. Swallow back the pain and type, "I miss you too." And there it is, That little break in me, You somehow know just where to find. I close my eyes. I don't miss us, I miss the you, Before you let yourself fade to gray. I don't miss the heavy cost, The parts of me that felt the loss. I can still love you, Still ache when you hurt, Still know your heart, And know we don't work. You don't have to mean nothing For me to let you go. Missing you is only missing you. It isn't the way Back Home. You say you're fine too quickly, Yeah, I know that one too. You say you'll drink Until you can't think, And I almost say, "Don't." I..... Almost ask how much, Almost stay awake, Almost fall right back Into that hole again. Instead I let you be. You tell me every distance can be crossed. Every wall can come back down. For a second I can almost see That version of you and me, Walking, living, laughing... I don't miss us, I miss the you, Before you let yourself fade to gray. I don't miss the heavy cost, The parts of me that felt the loss. I can still love you, Still ache when you hurt, Still know your heart, And know we don't work. You don't have to mean nothing For me to let you go. Missing you is only missing you. It isn't the way Back Home. It's the path we never took, Deceptive and shadowed, Drawing us in Like a might-have-been.... What a beautiful goddamned lie. I don't miss us, I miss the you Before you let yourself fade to gray. You don't have to mean nothing For me to let you go. Missing you is only missing you. It isn't the way Back Home. After two Your name comes through...
