[Intro] [Heavy electric guitar riff with dramatic thunder] Jaw fatigue... the silent killer of modern luxury! --- [Verse] You ordered prime ribeye, a thirty-ounce delight, But chewing takes twenty minutes... you haven't got all night! Save precious time at dinner, let us do the work for you, Savor the flavor without a single chew! --- [Chorus] Pre-Chewed Steak! Premium, tender, tenderized! Masticated perfection right before your eyes! Gourmet dining on a straw-friendly plane, Pre-Chewed Steak... feel the flavor, lose the pain! --- [Outro Tagline] [Huge guitar solo finish] Pre-Chewed Steak. Work smarter, not harder.
