89 point 9 PM. Goblin Grievances. Your d

89 point 9 PM. Goblin Grievances. Your daily reminder that things could be worse. (Wait, no they couldn't.) Broadcast from a slightly damp basement. [Sound of a heavy, dead clang and a weary sigh]" Time Check "It's five to the hour. Another hour of your life wasted, likely by being forced to listen to those stupid Gnomes. Don’t worry, the end of the day is just slightly less depressing than the middle of the day. You’re with Goblin Grievances." Traffic/Weather "The traffic is bad. Why? Because people are driving. The weather is cold. Why? Because the sun is unreliable. Don't expect us to cheer you up. We're Goblins. Just suffer through it. Brought to you by the Goblin Mechanical Repair—we fix everything, and we hate you all equally." "If you're happy and you know it... you're not listening to the right station. If I have to hear one more Khmer Princess say 'positive affirmations,' I'm going to drop a Goblin Mech on her house. 89 point 9 PM." "Got a problem with the Global Council? Don't call us. We don't care. But if you need an affordable, non-union laborer to dig a highly necessary moat around your yard—we're here. We are Goblin Workers. We are cheaper than a Kobold Miner and slightly less prone to explosions. (Slightly.)"