Landed on Earth for a snack attack, Humans munchin’ things I cannot process that. You deep-fry potatoes, that’s kinda neat But why you drink beans poured in your morning heat!? (You call it coffee… but it smells like FEAR!) Saw someone slurp noodles from a paper bowl, Then bite a cold pickle like it nourished their soul. You dip fried bird in a creamy sauce?? My circuits glitch ERROR tastebud loss! You eat plants, you eat cows, You eat… tiny sea bugs somehow?? Crusty claws from the ocean floor, You crack ’em open like "give me more!" WHY YOU EAT THAT?! Humans chew the strangest snacks! Spicy rocks (you call ’em “chips”) and sweet cow juice in frozen bricks?! WHY YOU EAT THAT?! You put fungus on your crusty bread, And I saw someone eat a raw fish bed Human cuisine got me SHOOK-SHOOK-SHOOK WHAT IS A HOTDOG? (no really what is a hotdog?) You drink leaf water, add cow cloud drops then slurp it like it's gold from mountain tops. You eat plants that taste like sadness, then drown them in ranch like emotional madness. (Your culinary therapy confuses me.) Popcorn explodes! Butter tsunami! Chocolate? YES okay that's yummy. But peanut butter? That sticky goo glue?? WHY DOES IT GLUE YOUR MOUTH IS IT ATTACKING YOU!? Humans lick salt rocks… Eat eggs from birds… Consume spicy lava sauce YOU ARE NOT NORMAL CREATURES You even drink bubbles that burn your throat!! WHY DO YOU LIKE SUFFERING?? WHY YOU EAT THAT?! Pickles, pizza, peanut paste Spicy fire noodles… tears on your face WHY YOU EAT THAT?! Tiny fish eggs, stinky cheese gas Y’all even deep-fry ICECREAM how does that pass!? I give up, Earth is too strange I’ll stick to cosmic stardust lunch (and maybe steal your donuts though) Initiating departure. Goodbye weird snack goblins. Send help, your food scared me.
