Sh-- in the Sauna? (LIVE in Albuquerque)

"How 'bout some honest to fuck... romance?!!" "Heh heh." [VERSE 1] I saw it bubble on the stones, a brown blister swelling in the heat— and you were grinning through your wet purple hair like you’d dropped that sizzling treat. It oozed slow, like a chocolate corpse, leaving mud trails on the cedar floor— and when it popped and sprayed the bench, you laughed like you're makin' fuckin' smores! Baby, if I’d glazed those steamin' rocks, I’d’ve banged a fist on the bench and whooped. You know damn well I claim my crimes— I ain't gonna sneak a fuckin' poop! I’d stand up, tits out, tail a-flickin', take credit with a kiss and a blow— if I’d unleashed that stone-boiling demon, you’d be the first to know. [CHORUS] Who... took a shit in the sauna? Stink waves shimmer in the steam… Who... took a shit in the sauna? Stones are bubbling with brown cream… Who... took a shit in the sauna? Heat unveiled the covert scheme… Who... took that fuckin' shit? [VERSE 2] Zeb, you rascal, I call horse shit! a thick wet cloud rolled out from you. That wasn’t perfume, that wasn’t steam, that was a feral pudding bog blastin' through. It slithered down like a gut-born fog, coating every sweating stranger’s face— and right when that sauna-crypt smell hit, your hooves shuffled out of place. I’d never befoul a hot box— I got bashful bowels, Scuzzy, you know. And if my guts were staging mutiny, I’d warn the spa before it flowed. I’d run out to the cold plunge pool before I let my sphincter spray— I don’t unleash brown abominations in a room with folks here to laze. [CHORUS] Who... took a shit in the sauna? Towels flappin' like panicked doves… Who... took a shit in the sauna? They're stampedin' like a flood… Who... took a shit in the sauna? They're gonna ban us from their club… Who... fuckin' took that shit? [BRIDGE] We saw the turds awaken… a molten omen born… The scatstone oracle rising… Divine if it be mine or yours… Sweat out the sinner… Sweat out the lie… Steam knows the truth… no matter how you try… [VERSE 3] Okay, fine—but my turd was tiny, just a little spatter-gremlin, born by mistake. A shy brown ghost that kissed the stone and hissed like a hatchling snake. Well fuck... mine was a thicker spawn, sure— a baked-sin cake with goopy dough. When the heat struck it, that thing bloomed, Boy, did that loaf of poopy grow! I really just wanted to clear the room... Have some fuckin' privacy... just me and you? Two wrongs collided in the heat and fused into a sludge seraph bright— a stink so strong the spa gods wept and all the fuckin' yuppies fled in fright. [FINAL CHORUS] We... took a shit in the sauna! Twin turds steaming, intertwined… We... took a shit in the sauna! Like our fates and loins, combined… We... took a shit in the sauna! Heat bound our scents in sacred rhyme… We both fuckin' shit in the fuckin' sauna!! "Fuckin' magical!"