Star Wars Truth

UK road rap, british rap, Flutes, Oboes, Clarinets, Bassoons, French Horns, Trumpets, Trombones, Tuba, Timpani, Snare Drum, Bass Drum, Cymbals, Triangle, cinematic space opera score

[intro]
(swoosh swoosh)

So I know I'm entering a minefield up in here
But I think it's time to bring out the big guns, innit?
The hottest of takes
The meanest of opinions!
You little bitches aren't ready!

UH!

(swoosh swoosh)

[chorus]
The new Star Wars movies aren't up to snuff
After Rise of Skywalker, man, I've had enough, and
I miss the series having a unified vision,
The prequels were flawed, but at least the visuals made me applaud
UH!

(swoosh swoosh)

[verse]
Don't need no back-up
Like Han, I'm goin solo
Force Awakens killed my bruv
Gots Mad, Gots Sad
Hasn't that man suffered enough?

Ain't no jedi mind trick, I got sick
of that story seemingly goin' nowhere
Although there, were some cool ideas
I just think it ended up like hot air
(in my opinion)

(swoosh swoosh)

--
You want some more Star Wars hot takes? Well here you go!
--

Jar Jar Binks
Bitch, He Stinks
I get they wanted levity
But that wasn't a necessity
And although I appreciate the effort
He wasn't well developed,
And his squeaky arsed voice made my itty bitty head hurt, 
but
I still think Rise of Skywalker was worse

[instrumental break - french horns]

Uh!
UH!

[verse]
I think it was a mistake
Not to plan the sequels out
Bitches didn't even know what the story was about
"Somehow Palpatine Returned"
Man at that point, you all had me concerned, as I yearned for a story that didn't make my heart burn.
(Good job on the visual effects tho)

(swoosh swoosh)
UH!

And why is Kylo Ren so angry, bitch!?
Bitch grew up rich, with Luke and Han on the hitch, and they tried too hard to make it suspenseful whether his alliegiances would switch!
(BITCH!)

UH!

Luke Skywalker was a good hero, man
He used to train with fuckin' Yoda, man
Now he just milkin' weird looking cows
As all I can do is to curdle my brows!

[instrumental break - trumpets]

Uh!

Mate, don't wanna force this don your throats like BB8, but
R2D2 was a better robot companion
What a stallion!
As he helpin out Luke with Vader and his battalion!

UH!

And then you added a black guy
Finally to be a lead, and he
ended up doin' nothing!
You ain't gettin' no honors creed from me!

UH!

Casino Planet
Casino Planet!
The worst slip-up I've seen since Justin and Janet!
You had Benicio there, and his plot went nowhere.
(but I can see why some people liked him)

(swoosh swoosh)
(bitch)

[outro]
Whoo!
Brave of you to still be around after all that!
Gotta give it up to my fans!
Ya'll the most courageous around, bruvs!
Keep this hype train goin!

*choo choo*

Y'all won't believe what's comin' up next!

Peace out!

3221/7500

[intro] (swoosh swoosh) So I know I'm entering a minefield up in here But I think it's time to bring out the big guns, innit? The hottest of takes The meanest of opinions! You little bitches aren't ready! UH! (swoosh swoosh) [chorus] The new Star Wars movies aren't up to snuff After Rise of Skywalker, man, I've had enough, and I miss the series having a unified vision, The prequels were flawed, but at least the visuals made me applaud UH! (swoosh swoosh) [verse] Don't need no back-up Like Han, I'm goin solo Force Awakens killed my bruv Gots Mad, Gots Sad Hasn't that man suffered enough? Ain't no jedi mind trick, I got sick of that story seemingly goin' nowhere Although there, were some cool ideas I just think it ended up like hot air (in my opinion) (swoosh swoosh) -- You want some more Star Wars hot takes? Well here you go! -- Jar Jar Binks Bitch, He Stinks I get they wanted levity But that wasn't a necessity And although I appreciate the effort He wasn't well developed, And his squeaky arsed voice made my itty bitty head hurt, but I still think Rise of Skywalker was worse [chorus] The new Star Wars movies aren't up to snuff After Rise of Skywalker, man, I've had enough, and I miss the series having a unified vision, The prequels were flawed, but at least the visuals made me applaud UH! [instrumental break - french horns] Uh! UH! [verse] I think it was a mistake Not to plan the sequels out Bitches didn't even know what the story was about "Somehow Palpatine Returned" Man at that point, you all had me concerned, as I yearned for a story that didn't make my heart burn. (Good job on the visual effects tho) (swoosh swoosh) UH! And why is Kylo Ren so angry, bitch!? Bitch grew up rich, with Luke and Han on the hitch, and they tried too hard to make it suspenseful whether his alliegiances would switch! (BITCH!) UH! Luke Skywalker was a good hero, man He used to train with fuckin' Yoda, man Now he just milkin' weird looking cows As all I can do is to curdle my brows! [chorus] The new Star Wars movies aren't up to snuff After Rise of Skywalker, man, I've had enough, and I miss the series having a unified vision, The prequels were flawed, but at least the visuals made me applaud UH! [instrumental break - trumpets] Uh! Mate, don't wanna force this don your throats like BB8, but R2D2 was a better robot companion What a stallion! As he helpin out Luke with Vader and his battalion! UH! And then you added a black guy Finally to be a lead, and he ended up doin' nothing! You ain't gettin' no honors creed from me! UH! Casino Planet Casino Planet! The worst slip-up I've seen since Justin and Janet! You had Benicio there, and his plot went nowhere. (but I can see why some people liked him) (swoosh swoosh) (bitch) [chorus] The new Star Wars movies aren't up to snuff After Rise of Skywalker, man, I've had enough, and I miss the series having a unified vision, The prequels were flawed, but at least the visuals made me applaud UH! [outro] Whoo! Brave of you to still be around after all that! Gotta give it up to my fans! Ya'll the most courageous around, bruvs! Keep this hype train goin! *choo choo* Y'all won't believe what's comin' up next! Peace out!

0/500