Cup of My Own Fire

Verse 1 What do you worship when the night gets loud? When your smile turns thin and your knees hit the ground? How do you live with an empty chest, Calling my healing a sickness, my peace a mess? Every damn second there’s a war in the air, Light on my shoulder, darkness in the stare. Sometimes the shadow wears a familiar face, Says it loves you while it drains your grace. Pre-Chorus But I’ve slept too long in the belly of pain, Danced with the ghosts, got baptized in shame. Now I hear the trees and I feel them breathe, And something holy is calling me free. Chorus I’m choosing benevolence, teeth in the storm, I’m choosing the light where my soul gets warm. You can call me strange, you can call me lost, Say I joined a cult just because I crossed Out of the grave where you wanted me still, Out of the dark that was bending my will. Drink from your own cup before you judge mine, Then get back to me when you’ve tasted the fire. Verse 2 I don’t need your fear dressed up like concern, I’ve walked through hell and I watched it burn. I know the pull of the blackened room, The pretty little voice that says, “Stay doomed.” But nature don’t lie when the world gets cruel, The river don’t mock me for needing renewal. The wind don’t whisper, “You’re too far gone,” It just keeps singing, “Child, move on.” Pre-Chorus So I plant my feet where the wild things grow, Let the sun hit places nobody knows. I’m not empty, I’m rebuilding bone, Turning broken ground into sacred stone. Chorus I’m choosing benevolence, teeth in the storm, I’m choosing the light where my soul gets warm. You can call me strange, you can call me lost, Say I joined a cult just because I crossed Out of the grave where you wanted me still, Out of the dark that was bending my will. Drink from your own cup before you judge mine, Then get back to me when you’ve tasted the fire. Bridge Dark and light, claw and wing, Both know my name, both hear me sing. But I don’t bow to the hands that bind, I don’t feed what eats my mind. So keep your whispers, keep your stones, I found a prayer in the roots and bones. I found a God in the morning rain, And I found myself walking out of the flames. Final Chorus I’m choosing benevolence, blood on my palms, Still raising my voice like a battle psalm. You can call me weird, you can call me insane, But I know what healed me, I know what changed. I’m done being claimed by the things I survived, I’m done letting darkness eat me alive. Drink from your own cup before you judge mine, Then get back to me when you’ve tasted the fire. Outro What do you worship? Fear or grace? I choose the light. I choose my place.