Destination Maui’s been my cubicle dream. My vacation imagination all that’s keeping me sane. Waking up at four a.m. to call for a ride. Taking off my belt and shoes and waiting in line. I pass business class, looks like I’m row thirty nine. A little inconvenience or it wouldn’t be flying. Middle seat again, my row mates sure fill their chairs. I sit back relax as we’ll soon be in the air. Captain comes on and tells us all, there’s been a slight delay. That was the cue for the baby crew to all start to bray. Beverages spilled, a fight broke out. Somebody passed a stone. Panic attacks as hours passed. Nobody nor time flown. Crazy that the crying’s breaking glass, in first class. Captain’s even threatening to eject their ass. Babies on this plane are ‘bout to drive me insane. This misery still beats my work life, so I can’t complain. (instrumental) Finally in the air, ears popping, the screaming don’t stop. Soothing newborns doomed to failure, head starts to throb. Babies on this plane are sending me off the deep. And just when we land the darlings all fall asleep. Babies on this plane are ‘bout to drive me insane. Next time I go out to Maui, I’ll take the train. Babies on this plane are ‘bout to drive me insane. Vacation’s just for zen-ass folks who can handle the strain.
