Verse 1 There’s a bloke at work, his name’s Reece Murphie, Wakes up every morning feeling kinda poorly, His back’s all stuffed, his joints all ache, He’s held together with a roll of tape. He’s had the shingles, he’s had the pain, Probably needs a holiday and a brand-new frame, But don’t feel sorry, don’t you dare, He’s got a dark joke that’ll strip your hair! Pre-Chorus He’s got the runs all organised, Every truck and every route devised, But just when you think he’s on a roll, He’s off to daycare, there’s a parental patrol! Chorus Oh, Reece Murphie, what a man, Scheduling deliveries the best he can, Back’s on fire and his nerves are shot, But he’s still the boss of the delivery lot! Oh, Reece Murphie, off he goes, Daycare pickup, there he goes! He’s got the pain, he’s got the plan, The darkest sense of humour in the van! Verse 2 You walk in Monday, he’s looking grim, You ask how he is, he gives you the grin, “Been better, mate, but I’ve been worse, At least I’m not dead… that’s a bloody curse!” He’s scheduling runs like a military chief, Giving every driver a little grief, He knows who’s going where and when, Then disappears at half past ten! Pre-Chorus His back says no, his brain says go, His shingles gave him quite a show, But when the clock hits daycare time, He’s out the door like he’s crossing the line! Chorus Oh, Reece Murphie, what a man, Scheduling deliveries the best he can, Back’s on fire and his nerves are shot, But he’s still the boss of the delivery lot! Oh, Reece Murphie, off he goes, Daycare pickup, there he goes! He’s got the pain, he’s got the plan, The darkest sense of humour in the van! Bridge – Spoken / Comedy Breakdown “Where’s Reece gone?” “Daycare.” “Who’s doing the runs?” “Reece.” “But he’s not here!” “Don’t ask me, mate, it’s in his spreadsheet!” “How’s your back, Reece?” “Like a dropped fridge!” “How’s the shingles?” “Let’s not scratch the surface!” Final Chorus – Big and Silly Oh, Reece Murphie, king of the runs, Organising trucks while avoiding the sun, He’s bent like a pretzel, but still in command, The most unreliable reliable man! Oh, Reece Murphie, give him a cheer, He’s scheduling tomorrow before he disappears, One bad back, one daycare plan, And the darkest bloody jokes in the delivery van! Outro He’s got the schedule, he’s got the pain, He’s got the shingles and he’s still insane, But if you need a delivery plan, Just ask Reece Murphie… …if he’s still in the van! 😂
