**“Technically Helping”** **Verse 1** Welcome to the compound, please enjoy your stay Sign the waiver, grab a badge, don’t stand in the way There’s a fragile little future in the middle of the floor And four highly qualified friends trying to fit it through a door Safety says stop Logistics says go Morale wants to talk about the feelings in the flow Captain’s at the front with a clipboard and a grin Saying, “Team, we’re almost aligned,” as the walls cave in **Pre-Chorus** We all read the briefing We all know the goal We all have a reason For losing control **Chorus** I was helping You were not I had a metric You had a thought We had a plan Then the plan got dropped Now the orb is cracked But the teamwork popped I was helping That’s my defense Highly aligned With limited sense If we all survive the performance review I’ll blame the process And promote you too **Verse 2** Keep it moving, keep it careful, keep the walkway clear There’s an executive watching and they smell fear Somebody bought a dolly, somebody blocked the hall Somebody saved the budget by buying nothing at all Stamp the form first No, carry it slow Why is there a ladder where the cart should go? Everybody’s right in a different little way And the Trust Orb’s making sparks by the wet-floor display **Pre-Chorus** We all chased the mission We all made it worse We all found a loophole In the universe **Chorus** I was helping You were not I had a metric You had a thought We had a plan Then the plan got dropped Now the orb is cracked But the teamwork popped I was helping That’s my defense Highly aligned With limited sense If we all survive the performance review I’ll blame the process And promote you too **Bridge** Most Valuable Liability Least Aligned with reality Carried the team emotionally Briefly, incidentally Most likely to mention policy Acting Lead of Synergy Best intentions, worst result Please remain calm during the consult **Breakdown** Nobody run Nobody stop Nobody touch it Somebody prop Hold the line Take the blame Check the box Change the name Final platform Ten seconds more Who let the captain Near the orb? **Final Chorus** I was helping You were not I had a metric You had a thought We had a plan Then the plan got dropped Now the orb is cracked But the teamwork popped I was helping That’s our defense Highly aligned With limited sense If we all survive the performance review I’ll blame the process And promote you too **Outro** Friend Compound, we did our best Please assess us as a group Friend Compound, one more test This time I swear I’ll help you through Technically Technically Technically helping you
