[Verse 1] Friday Night You Broke My Heart By Text Three Little Words “It’s Not You… Next” I Ordered Fries And A Plastic Cup Of Doom Then Danced Alone Beneath A Vending Machine Moon The DJ Played Some Trashy Rock’n’Roll My Broken Heart Forgot Its Assigned Role A Taxi Driver Said “Kid, You’ll Be Fine” I Said “Cool” Then Borrowed Someone’s Wine [Chorus] You Dumped Me Friday Night UFO Landed Saturday Night Now I’m Dancing In A Parking Lot And I Forgot Why We Even Fought You Dumped Me Friday Night Everything Turned Out Alright If This Is Rock Bottom What A View I Got Neon Lights And A UFO Too [Spoken Rap] Breaking News! Local Girl Survives Heartbreak Immediately Makes Questionable Decisions Witnesses Report Dancing Near A Convenience Store At 3 A.M. Possibly Possessed Possibly Fabulous [Verse 2] Mascara Running Sneakers Full Of Rain Somehow Everything Looked Funny Again A Stranger Asked “Hey, You Waiting For A Ride?” I Pointed At The Sky And Said “Yeah, That One” The Streetlights Blinked Like They Knew The Joke Even The Moon Looked Like It Choked Then Something Green Came Floating Through The Blue And Honestly It Had Better Moves Than You [Bridge] Beam Me Up Beam Me Out Beam Me Somewhere Loud Beam Me Up Beam Me Out This Planet’s Getting Crowded [Final Chorus] You Dumped Me Friday Night UFO Landed Saturday Night Now The Aliens Know My Name And They Think Your Haircut’s Lame You Dumped Me Friday Night Best Disaster Of My Life The Whole Galaxy Agrees You’re History I’m Cosmic Property [Outro] Hey! Hey! Hey! Take Me To The Dance Floor Mars! Hey! Hey! Hey! See You Never, Earth Boys! Beam Me Up!
