Spirit (In The Strip Mall)

[Intro - DJ Polter-Glitch & Dracula] "Look yonder! The ancient glyphs of power!" "Ummm... that says 'Former Bed Bath & Beyond'." "Hush! Our brethren gather within!" [Verse 1 - Dracula & Werewolf] We crossed the asphalt desert, seeking our unholy kin A glowing neon sanctuary, dark and full of sin! I saw the reaper standing by the discount clearance bay I bowed before his majesty, he had no words to say! I tripped his motion sensor, and his plastic jaw flew wide! He wheezed a pathetic, tiny scream and wobbled side to side! (Larry: "Look!, he's got a barcode on his neck!") [Pre-Chorus] No curses here, no tombs of stone Just PVC and hollow bone! Batteries not included with the costume tonight! [Chorus - Ensemble & Gang Vocals] SPIRIT! (In the strip mall!) Where the dark lords hang from hooks! SPIRIT! (On the shelf wall!) Selling discounted vintage looks! They've got my face in a zip-tie bag! Ten-dollar cape with a clearance tag! Step on the pad, make the skeleton shriek! We came for a coven, now we're crying for a week! [Verse 2 - Creature & Frank] I met a ghoul in a hockey mask who never said a word! A razor-gloved tormentor with the cruelest laugh I’ve heard! Frank shrank behind a shelf and hid his bolts in fear! (Frank: "He slashes people in their SLEEP?! Get me OUT of here!") No noble curses, ancient tombs, or aristocratic grace— Just senseless, gory carnage sold in every aisle and case! [Pre-Chorus - Mummy] No ancient sands, no sacred urns Just polyester that instantly burns! Press 'Try Me' now, the curse has lost its bite! [Chorus - Ensemble & Gang Vocals] SPIRIT! (In the strip mall!) Where the dark lords hang from hooks! SPIRIT! (On the shelf wall!) Selling discounted vintage looks! They've got my face in a zip-tie bag! Ten-dollar cape with a clearance tag! Step on the pad, make the skeleton shriek! We came for a coven, now we're crying for a week! [Bridge - Dracula & Retail Employee Voice] "Excuse me, creature of the crypt! Awaken from your daze!" "Where is the altar?! Where are the maidens?!" (Intercom: "Sir, please DON'T TOUCH THE ANIMATRONIC WEREWOLF!") [Guitar Solo - Werewolf & Invisible Man] (Frenzied surf-punk riffing interrupted by plastic squeaks and retail sensor chimes) [Chorus - Ensemble & Gang Vocals] SPIRIT! (In the strip mall!) Where the dark lords hang from hooks! SPIRIT! (On the shelf wall!) Selling discounted vintage looks! They've got my face in a zip-tie bag! Ten-dollar cape with a clearance tag! Step on the pad, make the skeleton shriek! We came for a coven, now we're crying for a week! [Outro - Dracula] Return to the hearse! There is no dignity in retail! [Wolfman whines:] ("...it comes with plastic fangs though...") NO! To the crypt!