Yeah Mind racing Right? (Still here though) [Verse 1] Every friend feelin' like a future threat Who to trust? Every text got a hidden subtext in the dust Every hug got a blade in the back of it tucked Smile sweet But the teeth say “keep that distance up” I been Side-eyein’ every motive that approachin’ me slow They say I’m broken I’m just holdin’ what they don’t wanna know Trauma talkin’ in a tone that only I ever hear Every “bro” sound like “watch him ” every laugh sound like fear I got Flashbacks playin’ like a film on repeat Same scene Same scream Same crack in the street Same smell Same shell I was trapped in at 3 Now it’s 3 A.M Knees to my chest Can’t breathe I hear Whispers in the white noise Hiss in the hum Every fan Every vent Every fridge got a tongue Sayin’ “they all wanna get you Better get them first” So I stay on high alert till my eyelids hurt [Chorus] There’s a hell in me I can feel it when it swell in me Every memory a felony Tryna jailbreak out the cell in me They call it paranoid crazy I call it stayin’ alive When my past and my panic shake hands They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind [Verse 2] Basic survival turn a whisper to a war I react Tiny problem Now it’s tidal Every ripple an attack Every shadow in the hallway Every creak in the floor Got me checkin’ every lock Every window Every door I got Mixed signals in my skull All tangled and frayed One voice say “relax ” other sayin’ “be afraid” Truth twist with a lie Tie knots in my brain Now I’m tryna chase calm while I’m outrunnin’ pain I been Lookin’ in the mirror like “you good?” “you sure?” Heart beatin’ like it’s beating down a battering door I don’t know if that glance was just bored or a threat Did they smirk? Did they snicker? Man I instantly sweat Every Room that I enter I’m already on defense Scan faces like a scanner Every gesture intense They say “breathe ” like it’s simple Like it’s somethin’ I forgot But my lungs learned long ago Oxygen can get you shot [Chorus] There’s a hell in me I can feel it when it swell in me Every memory a felony Tryna jailbreak out the cell in me They call it paranoid crazy I call it stayin’ alive When my past and my panic shake hands They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind [Bridge] Is that danger or a daydream? Can’t tell what’s real or made Is that kindness or a kill switch? Every choice feel like a blade (yeah) If I flinch I live If I chill I die So I live in that line Between “you trippin’” and “you right” [Chorus] There’s a hell in me I can feel it when it swell in me Every memory a felony Tryna jailbreak out the cell in me They call it paranoid crazy I call it stayin’ alive When my past and my panic shake hands They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind (static in my head) They take control of my mind[Verse 1] Tryna be a better person Scribble promises in margins Every time I start to soften Karma sharpens up its jargon Offer open palms They carve ‘em Watch the kindness turn to caution Heart a haunted house apartment Every carpet hides a coffin Trust issues in my tissues They sit twisting like a tourniquet Smile at me on Monday By the weekend they distorting it Tiny cracks in every compliment I’m sorting through Every “I got you” soundtrack to a sword they drew I’ve been boarding up the doors Trauma tour guide in my thoughts Showing old décor Every frame on the wall It’s a fall It’s a war But I still try again—what the hell am I reaching for? [Chorus] I’m tryna trust more Trust more Every time I touch hope I touch gore Make a little progress Then it’s one more Blade in the back Yeah Another closed door PTSD got a tight grip Lethal Playing every replay like a sequel Equal Parts prayer Parts poison in my core Still I keep trying in this vicious cycle I explore [Verse 2] Yeah I coach myself in circles Call it self-help Stealth hell Talking gentle to the mirror while my memories yell Every “you can heal” gets derailed by a detail Like the smell of that hall Then I stall Then I fail Hypervigilant vision Every whisper is a riddle Hidden motive in the middle of a giggle Side-eye the sunshine Flinch when it’s peaceful Peace feels deceitful when the past was that evil I say “lean in ” then I see them lean away And the replay ricochets Hits me three times a day Tell myself “They’re not them This is not that” But my nervous system never really bought that Maybe growth ain’t grand Maybe growth is granular Little acts of faith Shaky hands on the banister Maybe I can crack this cast-iron character Forgive the kid in me for choosing all that barricature Yeah I’m bruised by the past but I’m not that past I can trust a new face and still walk back fast I can guard my gate Leave it cracked Not crashed Tiny steps in a trap Still a path Still a path (yeah)
