The Tide has my Name

The tide has my name It calls and I answer I come back changed From every disaster I wash up quiet I wash up older With salt in my mouth And the world on my shoulder The tide has my name It learned it in childhood It sang through the walls When nobody else could It rocked me gently Then dragged me under Called it a blessing Called it my thunder I have been bright I have been buried I have been too much I have been barely I have been altar I have been ash I have been future I have been past The tide has my name It calls and I answer I come back changed From every disaster I keep trying to stand still But the wave keeps coming up Saltwater static Still singing in my blood Some days I forgive it Some days I don’t Some days I call it illness Some days I call it home Some days I am grateful I made it to morning Some days I am mourning The boy I was before it But I am not the water I am not the wreck I am not the warning That I wear around my neck I am the hands That build after breaking I am the breath That stays after shaking The tide has my name But I have my body I have my ghosts But they haven’t got me I come back changed But I still come back breathing I am still here I am still leaving The tide has my name It calls and I answer I come back changed From every disaster I keep trying to stand still But the wave keeps coming up Saltwater static Still singing in my blood And if I go under Don’t call me gone I have learned the language Of holding on The sea may know me The moon may pull But I am not empty Just tidal Just tidal Just tired Just trying Still mine