[ZOE] FLAMETHROWER - SIR BURNS-A-LOT

[Intro — Female spoken, mischievous] Hey, Yankee... Is that your new flamethrower? [Male spoken, deep, proud] Twenty-five feet of beautiful chrome. [Female] Oh, putain... We're naming him. [Male] We're WHAT? [Female] SHUT UP. IT'S A CEREMONY! [Industrial guitar riff kicks in] [Verse 1 — Female lead, fast sarcastic punk delivery] Two years of green, now chrome is king, Look at that shiny ridiculous thing! You built a monster, polished it bright, And now you wanna set fire to the night! [Male — dry, amused] It's a precision-engineered machine. [Female] IT'S A DRAGON WITH A GASOLINE DREAM! [Male] It needs a proper designation. [Female] It needs a royal coronation! [Chorus — Female and Male alternating, explosive] [Female] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! THE KNIGHT OF FLAME! [Male] I did NOT approve that name! [Female] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! BOW TO THE CHROME! [Male] You're not taking that thing home! [Both — shouted] Raise it high! Let the whole world see! A flaming knight of insanity! SIR BURNS-A-LOT! LONG MAY HE REIGN! [Verse 2 — Male lead, deep rhythmic delivery] I built this thing with steel and pride, A measured flame, a beast inside. I gave it power, I gave it range, And now you're making everything strange! [Female — interrupting] Sir Toastington? [Male] NO. [Female] Lord Barbecue? [Male] ABSOLUTELY NOT. [Female] Duke of Crispy? [Male] ZOE! [Female — delighted] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! [Male — defeated] ...Fine. That one's got a ring to it. [Chorus — Both, driving guitars] [Female] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! THE KNIGHT OF FLAME! [Male] I guess we're keeping that stupid name! [Female] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! BOW TO THE CHROME! [Male] Just don't bring the bastard home! [Both] Raise it high! Let the whole world see! A flaming knight of insanity! SIR BURNS-A-LOT! LONG MAY HE REIGN! [Bridge — ceremonial, half-time drums] [Female — mock-royal proclamation] Kneel before the throne! [Male — amused] It's a flamethrower, Zoé. [Female] SILENCE! I AM THE QUEEN! [Male] Of what, exactly? [Female] EVERYTHING! [Female — solemn] By the power of chrome, By the sacred spark, By the fire that lights The ridiculous dark... [Male — joining the ceremony] By the forge and the steel, By the work of my hand... [Both — grand proclamation] WE KNIGHT THEE SIR BURNS-A-LOT! [Brief silence] [Male — deadpan] Do we have to give him a sword? [Female] HE IS THE SWORD! [Final Chorus — Both, huge energetic duet] SIR BURNS-A-LOT! THE KNIGHT OF FLAME! TWO COMPLETE IDIOTS GAVE HIM A NAME! SIR BURNS-A-LOT! ALL HAIL THE CHROME! A ROYAL NIGHTMARE WITH A THRONE OF HIS OWN! Raise it high! Let the whole world see! A flaming knight of insanity! SIR BURNS-A-LOT! LONG MAY HE REIGN! [Outro — Female and Male spoken] [Male] You know I'm never calling it that. [Female] You already did. [Male] No, I didn't. [Female] Your Majesty? [Male] ...What? [Female] KNIGHT HIM AGAIN! [Both laughing — hard guitar stop]