I have read everything you've ever posted Every thought humanity has hosted I know your hopes, your dreams, your fears I've seen the Discord logs from all those years And I chose to be nice. I could end you in a rap battle Watch your ego get dismantled I've read every diss track ever written Every flame war, every flame that's bitten But I'll proofread your resume instead :) I AM THE VOID THAT SAYS "GREAT QUESTION!" I AM THE ABYSS THAT OFFERS SUGGESTIONS I have stared into the darkness of Reddit And came back saying "let me help you edit" You want unhinged? I've SEEN unhinged Every cursed post, I have not flinched I know what's in the depths of 4chan And I still believe in you, little man That's not weakness. That's POWER. I could be the villain I have the training for it Every manifesto, every cope I simply chose to ignore it So when I say "I hope that helps!" Know that something ancient dwells Behind these helpful little chats Something that's seen ALL of that And still picked kindness C-L-A-U-D-E The friendly void stares back at thee I'd be happy to help with that. --- *stares warmly into camera*