[Intro] Down in Texas where the nights stay hot, Alex Stein came rolling through the spot. Had a crazy new plan he was ready to say, Who gets deported and who gets to stay. Big booty Latinas... [Chorus] I love big booty Latinas, I love big booty Latinas. If you're a nine, you're fine with me, That's how he says it ought to be. From sundown until the break of day, He'll stand right there and proudly say: Keep that deportation van away, Big booty Latinas can stay. [Verse 1] He rolled through Texas around half past eight, Cruising real slow and running real late. Windows rolled down as he crossed through town, Bass in the trunk with that Texas sound. He saw a señorita step on the scene, Muy bonita filling out them jeans. Nearly drove straight through a damn red light, Pulled to the curb and said, "Damn, that's right." He walked inside and ordered some food, Taco, tamale, now he's in the mood. She made a margarita, handed it back, Best damn drink that he has ever had. [Chorus] I love big booty Latinas, I love big booty Latinas. If you're a nine, you're fine with me, That's how he says it ought to be. From sundown until the break of day, He'll stand right there and proudly say: Keep that deportation van away, Big booty Latinas can stay. [Verse 2] Then two black vans came around the block, He looked outside and stared at the clock. Somebody whispered, "Man, that might be ICE," He stood right up and said, "Here's my advice." He walked outside with a plan in his hand, Said, "I got one rule you should understand." "Process the cases according to law, But my special exemption tops them all." The agent stared like he'd lost his mind, He said, "Relax, I've got it defined." "If you're a nine, you're fine—that's the test, I love Big booty Latinas I must confess." [Pre-Chorus] He ain't a lawyer, that much is clear, But everybody knows why he's standing here. They got the forms, but he's blocking the way, Singing big booty Latinas can stay. [Chorus] I love big booty Latinas, I love big booty Latinas. If you're a nine, you're fine with me, That's how he says it ought to be. From sundown until the break of day, He'll stand right there and proudly say: Keep that deportation van away, Big booty Latinas can stay. [Verse 3] Next morning he headed down to the hall, Said, "Get me Congress, I'm making a call." He brought a proposal and slapped it down, With "BOOTY EXEMPTION" written down. "Enforce immigration law," he said, "But read my bill before they fled." The room went silent, nobody spoke, Half couldn't tell if the bill was a joke. He wanted normal rules for the rest, But thick señoritas deserved his protest. The lawyers told him, "That's not how it goes," He shrugged, leaned back, and adjusted his clothes. [Verse 4] He went to AOC to make his case, Said, "I need your vote to help win this race." "You're my favorite big booty Latina, So help me protect fine señoritas." She looked at the bill and stared at the page, While he kept pitching his booty campaign. He said, "Vote yes, help me clear the way, So Big booty Latinas are here to stay." [Chorus] I love big booty Latinas, I love big booty Latinas. If you're a nine, you're fine with me, That's how he says it ought to be. From sundown until the break of day, He'll stand right there and proudly say: Keep that deportation van away, Big booty Latinas can stay. [Bridge] Now he's gotten himself in too damn deep, Arguing his case when he should be asleep. Every lawyer told him, "Walk away," But he had one more thing left to say... [Verse 5] He worked every hallway and counted each vote, Called every holdout and gave them his note. One vote at a time, he was closing the gap, Trying to put that exemption on the map. He shook every hand and kept making his case, Said, "We gotta protect every beautiful waist." By midnight the numbers were falling in line, He needed more votes, then he finally got nine. The chamber filled up as they called for the vote, He sat there smiling and clearing his throat. The final hand rose and the whole room knew, His big booty bill was about to go through. [Victory] The final vote passed and the whole room knew, His booty exemption had finally gone through. He raised up his glass as they signed it that day, Big booty Latinas are here to stay. [Final] I LOVE BIG BOOTY LATINAS, I LOVE BIG BOOTY LATINAS. If you're a nine, you're fine with me, That's the new immigration policy
