White Ghost Candlelight

“White Ghost” Verse 1 Imagine if I disappeared tonight, Folded up the dark and stepped outside the light, Would anybody feel the weight I fight, Or would they post my name and call it “life”? Would fake friends dress their guilt in white, Say they “missed the signs” beneath the candlelight, Turn every cruel word into “I was just uptight,” Then ask for prayers like sympathy makes it right? Would enemies confess beside my grave, Talk about the broken man they could have saved, Say they never meant the things they gave, Then cry for cameras acting brave? I wonder who would finally see, The hollow place they carved in me, The boy beneath the man I tried to be, The ghost I fed so everyone else could eat. Pre-Chorus And I’m so tired of surviving me, Tired of breathing just to bleed, Tired of begging silently, For somebody to notice I’m not free. Chorus Don’t let me become a photograph, A name you whisper after I collapse, Don’t love me louder when I’m gone, Love me while I’m holding on. Don’t bring flowers to the pain you made, Don’t call it tragic at the grave, I was screaming underneath my skin, Begging someone, let me in. And if I fade before the dawn, Tell my son I tried so long, Tell the world I lost the war, But I was more than what I couldn’t carry anymore. Verse 2 If you know me, you know I’ve always worn the rain, Smiled through the damage, joked around the pain, Sat at my desk with ghosts inside my brain, Military memories marching through my name. Pulled out a chair like judgment in the air, Tried to write a letter just to prove I care, But every word fell naked on the stairs, Too heavy for a heart already scared. My daughter’s memory still burns through bone, A tiny voice inside a silent home, I learned how deep a father feels alone, When heaven takes the love he called his own. I called my dad just to hear him there, Tried to sound normal, tried to sound repaired, Wanted to say, “I’m sorry I’m impaired,” But all I said was, “Man, please take care.” Pre-Chorus 2 And my brother saved my life again, More times than he will comprehend, The only friend who stayed through bends, The kind of love that never ends. Chorus Don’t let me become a photograph, A name you whisper after I collapse, Don’t love me louder when I’m gone, Love me while I’m holding on. Don’t bring flowers to the pain you made, Don’t call it tragic at the grave, I was screaming underneath my skin, Begging someone, let me in. And if I fade before the dawn, Tell my son I tried so long, Tell the world I lost the war, But I was more than what I couldn’t carry anymore. Verse 3 The part of me that lives in him, I pray it shines where I got dim, I hope he never learns to swim, Inside the flood I’m drowning in. I wanted to tell my sister, “Sis, I love you,” But pride and pain split every sentence in two, I had a thousand things I never pushed through, And every unsaid word still cuts me new. Left my mother love inside a phone, A trembling message in a tired tone, A grown man still afraid of being alone, Trying to make a goodbye sound like home. When they remember me, I hope they say, “He made us laugh on the darkest day, He gave too much of himself away, He hid the hurt so we’d be okay.” Bridge But I don’t want a room full of regret, I don’t want tears from mouths that forget, I don’t want halos made of debt, Or fake forgiveness on the internet. I wanted hands before the fall, Not polished speeches after all, Not marble names, not chapel walls, Just one real voice to take my call. I was not weak, I was worn, A house still standing in a storm, A child inside a man reborn, With every scar still begging to be warm. Final Chorus Don’t let me become a photograph, A headline fading into ash, Don’t love me louder when I’m gone, Love me while I’m holding on. Don’t bring flowers to the pain you made, Don’t call it tragic at the grave, I was screaming underneath my skin, Begging someone, let me in. And if I make it through the dawn, Tell my son I’m still holding on, Tell my ghosts I’m not their war, I am more than what I couldn’t carry anymore. Outro And it’s okay, I’m still breathing, Even when the dark feels like believing, I am not the white ghost of who I was meant to be, I’m the broken man still trying to be free.