Norwoods bad day

(Pre-Chorus)
He’s tryin’ to scan IDs, but he’s scanning his own hand,
Sirens go off, Norwood doesn’t understand.
He pushes the wrong button, shuts the whole base down—
And that’s the moment Norwood became the talk of the town.

(Chorus)
Oh Norwood, you got no-good wood,
Everything you touch goes wrong like it should.
Security guard life got you misunderstood,
Worst day ever but you’re doin’ it good.
Oh Norwood, buddy, you’re screwed—
Tryna stand tall but your “wood”’s gone soft.

(Verse 2)
He’s walkin’ on patrol when he hears a loud clank,
Turns out it’s just his belt—snapped, dropped, and sank.
Pants fall down, and the cameras caught it live,
Now Norwood’s mooning half the military hive.
Lieutenant walks up like, “Son, what happened here?”
Norwood shrugs, says, “Sir… the wood interfered.”
He can’t win in pool or ping pong because his wood gets in the way.

(Pre-Chorus)
He trips on a cone, faceplants in the dirt,
Radio goes off: “Norwood, what’s your status? You hurt?”
He keys the mic, mumbling, “I’m still good I think,”
Right before he knocks over the fuel truck sink.

(Bridge)
Now he’s stuck writing statements until midnight strikes,
Spell-checks “Norwood” wrong like twenty-four times.
Commander walks in like, “Boy, you’re done for today,”
Norwood salutes backward and just walks away.

(Chorus)
Oh Norwood, you got no-good wood,
Everything you touch goes wrong like it should.
Security guard life got you misunderstood,
Worst day ever but you’re doin’ it good.
Oh Norwood, buddy, you’re screwed—
But tomorrow’s another day… for your wood to come unglued.

2349/7500

(Verse 1) Norwood woke up late, sandals on the wrong feet, Spilled his coffee on his shirt before he hit the fleet He’s stumbling to the gate, tryna not to look gay But everybody’s laughin’ ’cause he’s still rockin’ morning wood— Norwood, man, why you always startin’ shifts like this? Your whole career feels like a government-funded accident. He’s at the Casino playing Poker everyday but won’t even drink Lost all his money to some Korean with no underpants Now he’s 50,000 dollars in debt to a mob boss (Pre-Chorus) He’s tryin’ to scan IDs, but he’s scanning his own hand, Sirens go off, Norwood doesn’t understand. He pushes the wrong button, shuts the whole base down— And that’s the moment Norwood became the talk of the town. (Chorus) Oh Norwood, you got no-good wood, Everything you touch goes wrong like it should. Security guard life got you misunderstood, Worst day ever but you’re doin’ it good. Oh Norwood, buddy, you’re screwed— Tryna stand tall but your “wood”’s gone soft. (Verse 2) He’s walkin’ on patrol when he hears a loud clank, Turns out it’s just his belt—snapped, dropped, and sank. Pants fall down, and the cameras caught it live, Now Norwood’s mooning half the military hive. Lieutenant walks up like, “Son, what happened here?” Norwood shrugs, says, “Sir… the wood interfered.” He can’t win in pool or ping pong because his wood gets in the way. (Pre-Chorus) He trips on a cone, faceplants in the dirt, Radio goes off: “Norwood, what’s your status? You hurt?” He keys the mic, mumbling, “I’m still good I think,” Right before he knocks over the fuel truck sink. (Chorus) Oh Norwood, you got no-good wood, Everything you touch goes wrong like it should. Security guard life got you misunderstood, Worst day ever but you’re doin’ it good. Oh Norwood, buddy, you’re screwed— Tryna stand tall but your “wood” ain’t in the mood. (Bridge) Now he’s stuck writing statements until midnight strikes, Spell-checks “Norwood” wrong like twenty-four times. Commander walks in like, “Boy, you’re done for today,” Norwood salutes backward and just walks away. (Chorus) Oh Norwood, you got no-good wood, Everything you touch goes wrong like it should. Security guard life got you misunderstood, Worst day ever but you’re doin’ it good. Oh Norwood, buddy, you’re screwed— But tomorrow’s another day… for your wood to come unglued.

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