[Verse 1] My dreams came true today In a literal way I found a dusty genie lamp And rubbed it right away It granted me a wish Said, “Kid, just name your prize” So I said, “Make my dreams come true!” Now I regret that line [Pre-Chorus] It was a big mistake A horrible mistake I should’ve used my brain Before that genie break! [Chorus] I wanted power, money, fame A castle and a yacht Beautiful women everywhere And treasure I could flaunt But that’s not what I got oh no no no, that’s not what I got! The genie gave me my actual dreams The ones I have at night! [Verse 2] I got sent back to high school Walking naked down the hall I’m my age right now somehow And still late for study hall “Because you missed one assignment You must repeat the year!” While teenagers point and laugh And the principal is a Bear [Pre-Chorus] I tried to wake up fast But the nightmare only grew Turns out the genie’s contract Had some awful fine print too [Chorus] I wanted power, money, fame A mansion by the shore Beautiful women loving me In harems by the score But that’s not what I got No, that’s not what I got! The genie gave me my actual dreams And now I’m totally distraught! [Verse 3] Now I’m driving the family truck Down a hill without the brakes while Fighting ninjas in quicksand and the steering wheel just shakes I’m trying hard to fly away By flapping both my arms But gravity’s still undefeated And ignoring my alarm [Verse 4] There’s an evil green lady Trying to kidnap me from my Mom Then my dad looks just the same But something’s clearly wrong I say, “Dad, are you my father?” He says, “Son, of course I am!” But I know he’s an imposter ‘Cause he wore his other glasses! [Chorus] I wanted power, money, fame A golden throne to claim Beautiful women everywhere All chanting out my name But that’s not what I got No, that’s not what I got! The genie gave me my sleeping dreams And now my sanity’s lost! [Bridge] Now I’m stuck inside a daycare Trying not to step on kids While attempting magic spells Like some bargain wizard did “Abra—cadabra—alakaz—OW!” That spell went very wrong And now the toddlers rule the room While I run screaming along [Breakdown spoken] Wait… Oh no… It’s the cat creatures again… [Verse 5] They’re chasing me through the forest With glowing yellow eyes I’m running from their whiskers While the moon falls from the sky I wish I could wake up now End this cursed nightmare But the genie says, “Sorry pal, These are the dreams you made.” [Final Chorus] I wanted power, money, fame A kingdom to control Beautiful women everywhere And riches by the bowl But that’s not what I got No, that’s not what I got! The genie gave me my nighttime dreams And now I’m permanently fraught! [Outro] I wish I could end this nightmare But I need another lamp Oh no—please genie spare me— Don’t make me get kissed by my aunt! No please don’t make me get kissed by my weird… AUNT! [screaming guitar solo as cat creatures ret
