Midsummer Woes [Nordic Discord Challenge]

*** Nordic Discord Challenge, w. 21. Genre: Broadway Musical, Theme: The world’s most boring day - a musical. *** [Overture - Instrumental: Church organ hum, distant thunder, one clattering teacup] [Verse 1 - Half-sung, half-spoken like a Tom Waits lament] Midsummer noon, sun bleeds on stone, And I, alone, a kingdom of one. Forgot the bread, forgot the beans, The store—a shuttered dream. I ran. Too late. The bell had tolled. The world was warm, my stove was cold. [Chorus - Grand Andrew Lloyd Webber style] Where were you, oh calendar mind? You traitor of time, you left me behind! No feast, no wine, no voice, no door— Just silence echoing off the kitchen floor! [Verse 2 - Broken melody, bitter irony] In the cupboard? Dust and salt. No milk. No jam. My fault. My fault. I baked with water, prayed to flour, A soggy crown for my lonely hour. [Bridge - Slow, theatrical crescendo] They rose like ghosts, my pale scones, Steamless, joyless, heavy as stones. I spread no butter—I had none! Each bite a hymn to oblivion. [Instrumental - Warped music box waltz, creaking and off-key] [Verse 3 - Quiet, almost whispered] I watched the window, watched the light Slide off the walls and out of sight. The birds were somewhere having fun, I counted tiles. I named… each… one. [Finale - Full orchestration, romantic absurdity] A toast! To crumbs! To kitchen chairs! To empty shelves and blank stares! Let no one say I didn’t dine— On silence, starch, and alkaline! [Outro - Soft piano, dripping faucet] So ends my midsummer ball, No partner came, no food, no call. Just me, a fork, and scones of shame— In candleless, operatic fame.