Yeah… this ain’t no love song. This that jailhouse confession booth. That pill bottle gospel. That chain-link lullaby. Turn it up. Woke up sticky — sheets smell like sin and cheap gin Her hips on my thigh, tattooed where the needles been Percs poppin’ like firecrackers under July heat We fucked like we owed the devil rent at midnight street Roll one up, chase it down with Crown and regret She said, “Baby, don’t stop,” I said, “Ain’t stopped yet.” Phone buzz — probation call, missed three damn weeks Cuffed at Waffle House, syrup still drippin’ off my teeth I was king of the gutter, prince of the pipe Danced with the devil ‘til he clipped my wings right Now I’m countin’ bars instead of cash Prison got me preachin’… but I still cuss in class SEX AND DRUGS AND COUNTY JAIL BLUES! Rehab white walls screamin’ “YOU GOTTA CHOOSE!” Love taste like relapse, kiss like a blade Steel-toe boots stompin’ out the mess I made CHAIN-LINK HALLELUJAH — hands to the sky! If I make it clean, swear to God I’ll try… But tonight? I’m still dirty. Still wired. Still high. Cellblock C, bunk 7, CO named Big Ray Said, “Boy, you look like trouble wrapped in yesterday.” Traded ramen for smokes, wrote rhymes on commissary slips Dreamt of pussy and purple drank while doin’ leg lifts Got jumped in the yard — stitches stitched with lies Told my girl I was workin’, she knew by my eyes She slid me a note: “Come home or die clean” I laughed… then cried… then shot up in the rec room scene Group circle Tuesday — tears fall like Georgia rain “My name is D-Ray… and I’m chained to the pain.” She visits Sundays, perfume over piss and bleach We hold hands through glass — can’t reach what I can’t reach Rehab’s got rules… but my heart’s still wild Like a Mustang with no brakes, runnin’ off the mile… Now I’m back on the block — but the block don’t know me Clean six months, go to meetings, still feel lonely See my old plug? Nod, keep walkin’ — no eye contact Cravings hit like thunder — I breathe, don’t react Met a girl in N.A. — she got scars like mine We don’t fuck on first dates… we talk till sunrise She don’t want the chaos, just the man beneath the smoke I’m learnin’ slow… how to live… not just survive the choke SEX AND DRUGS DON’T OWN ME NO MORE! Jail taught me lessons that love couldn’t ignore! Rehab saved my soul, but rock n’ roll saved my sound From concrete floors to stages — I’m still gettin’ down! DIRTY SOUTH HALLELUJAH — raised from the mud! I was broken, branded, buried… now I’m BLOODED. If you fall? Fall forward. One step. One fight. I’m alive tonight… and that’s my goddamn right. “I still dream about her thighs…” “I still crave that purple haze…” “But I choose the sunrise now…” “...even when it burns.” I AIN’T PERFECT — BUT I’M FREE.
