Not cool, dude

[Verse 1] We need to talk about the way you stare— Twenty seconds, no blinking, just open, vacant glare. And then you scream at the ceiling Like the silence did you wrong. Is this… a cry for help, or just your version of a song? [Verse 2] You yell at strangers at the door, But not a single demand— Just volume for the sake of it, Like they’ll understand. And “thank you” for alerting me when the cat walks in the room, But does every minor update have to sound like impending doom? [Verse 3] You’re always two steps behind me, No matter where I go— Even in the bathroom, you act like I’m about to put on a show. I do not want to wrestle. It’s not that kind of night. Please… give me back my personal space Before I lose my will to fight. [Verse 4] I’d love to say you’re gentle But you flop like you’ve been shot, Groaning, writhing, staring wild— Dude, what the actual fuck? And for the love of everything holy, Can you keep your dick out of your mouth? Is this a kink, a curse, or just The only hobby you’ve found? [Bridge] Your excitement is Olympic Every time I step outside— I was gone five minutes, You act like someone died. And look, I’ll keep this simple: Whatever you think about poop? No. Not in any context. No touching, no eating, no group. [Final Line — the rug pull] I could go on forever, But what’s the point, you see? Turns out you’re a dog, my dude— And you’re still family.