A parody of "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" ©copyright 1988 by The Proclaimers / WC Music Corp. o/b/o Zoo Music Ltd. [Short percussive guitar intro] [Verse 1] When I wake up, well I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy still stuck here on the couch And when I’m hungry, yeah I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who thinks it through, no doubt If I stand up, well I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who sighs and checks the time And if I hover, yeah I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who says, “Eh… I’ll be fine” [Chorus] But I would walk five hundred inches And I would walk five hundred more Just to be the man who walked a thousand Inches to the fridge and hit the floor [Verse 2] When I’m considerin’, yes I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who counts each painful step And when the hunger grows from what I didn’t eat I’ll regret the snacks I never prepped When I stand up (When I stand up), oh I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who stretches out his knees And if I grow weak, well I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who leans on walls for peace [Chorus] But I would walk five hundred inches And I would walk five hundred more Just to be the man who walked a thousand Inches to the fridge and hit the floor [Post-Chorus] Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy snack snack snack Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy midnight snack [Verse 3] When I’m starvin’, well I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who dreams of bread and cheese And when I’m plannin’, well I know I’m gonna dream I’m gonna dream about the sandwich I will achieve When I reach in (When I reach in), well I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who grabs the mustard slow And when I stack it high (when I stack it high), yes I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the guy who builds it like a throne I’m gonna be the guy who crowns it, don’t you know [Chorus] But I would walk five hundred inches And I would walk five hundred more Just to be the man who walked a thousand Inches to the fridge and hit the floor [Post-Chorus] Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy toast it now Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy worth it now Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy legendary Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da da da (Da-da da da) Da-da dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy sand-wich king [Final Chorus] And I would walk five hundred inches And I would walk five hundred more Just to be the man who walked a thousand Inches to the fridge… …and collapses on the floor
