manhole man

[Dedicated to my dear friend Andy - a different Andy to me, honest!] [lyrics by Andrew Buller, tune by suno.com - created in Canterbury, Kent - 10/2/25] [short instrumental] [slow build] [short instrumental] sit up straight pay attention ignore the forecast this is a public information broadcast there are many covers out there I've documented them all but I am the original the original, undercover manhole discoverer if you walk the streets of London no, not in that other song come back switch back on this is my singalong my manhole singalong [short instrumental] [chorus] this ain't trainspotting we're drainspotting, drainspotting look down, not up look to the streets beneath your feet there's a world of wonder waiting to uncover with me, manhole man (with me, manhole man) some call me Andy but I'm really your manhole man (manhole man) [short instrumental] [spoken] "does anyone else remember the Great Stink of 1858?" [verse 2] I'm writing a book I know you can't wait encyclopaedic therapeutic well worth its weight in cast iron or now, more commonly concrete used in conjunction with cast iron they've changed over the years it's all in the book so well worth a look featuring Garton and King George Jennings Thomas Crapper all originals all the best makes no space for fakes [short instrumental] [chorus] this ain't trainspotting we're drainspotting, drainspotting look down, not up look to the streets beneath your feet there's a world of wonder waiting to uncover with me, manhole man (with me, manhole man) some call me Andy but I'm really your manhole man (manhole man) [short instrumental] [spoken] "in 1957 the first manhole was launched into space" [verse 3] and if you're looking for romance then look no further than my open-toed sandal tour - the manholes of London completing our trip with nibbles and drinks at the pumping station our pumping station pumping the bowels pumping the tunes [short instrumental] [chorus] this ain't trainspotting we're drainspotting, drainspotting look down, not up look to the streets beneath your feet there's a world of wonder waiting to uncover with me, manhole man (with me, manhole man) some call me Andy but I'm really your manhole man (manhole man) [short instrumental] [spoken] [Taylor] "abstract flowers in an otherwise arid field" [verse 4] if you're ever having trouble falling asleep count on, recount on what's beneath your feet manhole dreams sweet manhole dreams sweet coming soon, very soon... our first manhole cover convention at our favourite, hospitable pumping tunes station see the news headlines for further information...