[Intro] [Long Intro] [Intro] “Well hey there nurse! I ain’t feelin’ so good… (…or maybe I am?) I need some serious attention!” [Verse 1] Checked into the hospital, weak in the knees, Admitting said, “Son, could be a common disease,” But then you walked in, black cat suit, gold chain swingin’, Boots hit the floor and my ears start ringin’! You took my pulse, said, “Boy, sit still,” But my heart went racin’, oh what a thrill, You wrote somethin’ down but I couldn’t read— All I saw was trouble at a dangerous speed! [Chorus] After you, nurse… (bless my soul) Call a doctor! After you, nurse… (I lose all control) Call a doctor! You shake me up, you spin me ‘round, The way I’m feelin’ my feet don’t touch the ground— After you, nurse… call a doctor! [Verse 2] Heard about your nursing from a fella named Joe, He told me things I didn’t wanna know Said you got a son, name Napoleon, And told me about the type of lingerie you like to put on! You lean in close with a sweet little smile, Say, “Said relax boy, you’re gonna be here for a while!” You check my pulse but you just weren’t sure— She said “well what you got there ain’t no cure!” [Chorus] After you, nurse… (take your time!) Call a doctor! After you, nurse… (I’m feelin’ just fine!) Call a doctor! You make being a patient more than all right, And told me to “relax, boy and hold on tight”— After you, nurse… call a doctor! [Verse 3] You strut down the hall like you own the place, A Florence Nightingale with a bit more grace, Clipboard swingin’, boots go click-clack, Whole dang ward nearly had a heart attack! I tried to rest but I couldn’t behave, Flatline just turned into a tidal wave, Doc walked in said, “What’s goin’ on?” I said, “She came in—and I’m gone gone gone!” [Bridge] Well the lights went flashin’, held on tight, Room start spinnin’ left to right, You said, “Relax,” but I can’t comply— You said it's even better when I try! If If this is care, I’m done for sure, Ain’t no pill and there ain’t no cure, If you keep on workin’ me like that— Wheel me out flat on my back! [Long Solo] [Verse 4 – after bridge, big energy] Now the doc’s got charts, and he’s scratchin’ his head, Says, “Son, according to these readings you should be dead!” I said, “Doc, it ain’t what you prescribe— It’s that nurse and all her jive!” She winked once and I lost my breath, That kinda treatment is the best, She winked once and I lost my breath, That kinda treatment is the best, If I don’t make it, tell my kin— I went out smilin’ when she walked in! [Chorus] After you, nurse… (let’s see that charm!) Call a doctor! After you, nurse… (ring the alarm!) Call a doctor! You shake me down to my very soul, Nurse me back and make me whole— After you, nurse… call a doctor! [Outro] “After you, nurse… who knew Might be too late for a doctor Call a code blue” [Outro] [End Song] [End]
