[Intro: Solemn, church-like cathedral organ playing a haunting minor-key hymn, joined by a warm, fingerpicked acoustic guitar in the style of Ed Sheeran's Afterglow meets Nick Cave] [Sound Effect: Distant church bell tolling once, a heavy wooden door creaking open] [Verse 1: Low, gravelly, confessional vocal delivery in the style of Ed Sheeran] I tried to be a good man, bought a picket-fence suburban home Grew a little vegetable patch, stopped roaming like a gnome Went to local barbecues and smiled at neighbor Ned Put the razors in the furnace, put the scalpels in the shed Tried to wash the crimson off the creases of my palms Sitting on the porch at dusk, reciting Sunday psalms But suburban life is quiet, and the quiet starts to itch When you used to be the phantom lurking in the ditch [Pre-Chorus: A single foot-stomp enters, followed by a sharp handclap and a rising organ chord] Ten years of hiding out in khakis and a fleece While the beast inside my ribcage begged for its release Today's the thirty-first of October, autumn's sacred night And the old vocation’s calling me back to the candlelight [Chorus: Massive, soaring gospel-folk rock explosion with a full backing choir in the style of Ed Sheeran and Hozier] Hallelujah, I'm a born-again killer! Trading in my cardigan for something a bit chillier! Drop the suburban mask, let the sharpened metal shine This Halloween baptism is back to being mine! No more lawnmower Sundays, no more neighborhood grace I'm putting on the leather mask and taking back my place! [Verse 2: Upbeat, foot-stomping acoustic rhythm, choir clapping along in syncopation] Polished up the butcher knives, oiled the hickory handle Lit a ring of crimson wax around each tallow candle The mask was hanging in the wardrobe, smelling just like dust Waiting for a master with a resurrected lust Stepped out on the front lawn as the trick-or-treaters passed With their plastic pirate swords and masks of molded glass Little Timmy knocked my door, said, "Mister, trick or treat?" And I smiled beneath my canvas hood and checked his little heartbeat [Pre-Chorus: Organ swells to a thunderous crescendo, choir harmonies layer into a wall of sound] (Praise the blade, praise the dark, praise the autumn chill!) I’ve been born again to do what I was born to kill! [Chorus: Full arena-sized gospel-rock power, roof-raising vocals] Hallelujah, I'm a born-again killer! Trading in my cardigan for something a bit chillier! Drop the suburban mask, let the sharpened metal shine This Halloween baptism is back to being mine! No more lawnmower Sundays, no more neighborhood grace I'm putting on the leather mask and taking back my place! [Bridge: Music strips down to a slow, menacing stomp-and-clap rhythm. Choir chanting in a chilling drone] [Vocal Style: Spoken-word preacher cadence, dripping with dark irony] Brothers and sisters... we have gathered here today To celebrate a sinner who has thrown his peace away. The garden weeds are high, the vegetable patch is dead... And the harvest festival is happening in the shed! Can I get an amen? Can I get a slice? (AMEN!) (TWICE!) [Guitar & Organ Solo: Blistering, soaring rock organ and acoustic guitar duel that sounds like a demonic church service] [Chorus: Maximum chaotic, joyful, terrifying volume with full choir stomping and clapping] HALLELUJAH! The born-again killer is free! Slicing through the neighborhood for all the world to see! The picket fence is burning and the suburbs are in flame! And every trick-or-treater's screaming out my holy name! [Outro: The massive wall of sound abruptly cuts to a single, quiet acoustic chord and the sound of a porch light turning off] [Vocal Style: Warm, cheerful, bone-chillingly polite Ed Sheeran delivery] Happy Halloween, neighbors. It's so good to be back home. [Sound Effect: A sharp metal snip, followed by a child's sudden gasp and a cheerful porch-light click] [End]
