Badfatler: Big B.A.D Spud V2

[Intro: Spoken] He’s a root with a ruthless grin Swagger cape Safety pin Shouts “Fear me I’m your overlord!” Trips on his own secret trapdoor Spins a chair Does an evil laugh Rolls right out Tears up the graph Every blueprint Every cruel demand Badfatler -- evilest spud of this land [Instrumental Overture] [Verse 1] Secret lair in his mama’s garage Laser labeled “do not touch” He stutters over his own monologue Blows the fuse with a single clutch (woops) [Verse 2] Badfatler’s big bad spud Charts and arrows on the wall again Step one Step two Chaos Bam Step three: trip over a trash can He shakes it off Dust in his hair “I meant to do that” -- smug little stare The world is safe He doesn’t care Badfatler’s big bad plan (again, again!) [Pre-Chorus] Badfatler -- villain spud Sticky notes on his frying pan Step one: fumble Step two: again He’s the king of the almost-win Badfatler -- villain spud Twirl that mustache Strike that stand World domination slips from his hand But he’ll try And try And try again [Chorus] Badfatler -- big bad spud His big bad plans fall apart like wet cardboard stands He yells “Kneel down Taste despair!” Then sets his own desk on fire mid-air Every time the scheme goes wrong He just shrugs and hums a victory song “I’ll be back You petty clan! I only failed the practice plan!” [Interlude] One day he’ll conquer something Maybe just the remote Maybe a burlap commode Laughing in the mirror Crown made of frying pan “The world is not ready For my evil reign!” (mwahaha!) [Instrumental Break] [Verse 3] He built a doom-ray satellite From mud and duct tape Accidentally hit himself Now his lair’s a cheese fondue lake Minions slide past in swirlies He calls it “Phase Two Part B” Claims he meant to flood the fortress “With delicious tyranny!” [Bridge] “Today I steal all the socks" He shouts Writes it huge in a purple pen Forgets the date of the grand heist Stares confused at the clock (It’s ten) [Verse 4] Tried to freeze the city with a weather-ray contraption Plugged it in wrong Started fireworks reactions Police just watched Eating corn on a stick He bowed like it’s planned "That’s right I meant that trick" [Pre-Chorus] Badfatler -- villain spud Sticky notes on his frying pan Step one: fumble Step two: again He’s the king of the almost-win Badfatler -- villain spud Twirl that mustache Strike that stand World domination slips from his hand But he’ll try And try And try again [Chorus] Badfatler -- big bad spud His big bad plans fall apart like wet cardboard stands He yells “Kneel down Taste despair!” Then sets his own desk on fire mid-air Every time the scheme goes wrong He just shrugs and hums a victory song “I’ll be back You petty clan! I only failed the practice plan!” [Interlude] Laser in a cardboard box Labeled “totally real doom ray” He hits the switch Lights go out He just forgot to pay Henchmen stare They’ve seen worse Last week he tried To steal a purse (his own) [Instrumenla Break] [Verse 5] He says “Failure’s just rehearsal For my final Fatal show If the trap door hits me first That’s just method Don’t you know?” Sprays himself with knockout gas “Tested it! It works on me!” Wakes up Writes a bigger scheme Labelled: “GENIUS DO NOT EAT” [Bridge 2] Badfatler’s -- most villainous spud He shouts “This is not the end!” Books a sequel Calls it “fail again” Every time the scheme goes wrong He just writes a bigger Dumber song “I’ll be back Improve the brand Next time it’s the ultimate plan!” [Outro] Cape and top hat Evil starch Badfatler in charge Russet villain Dreams too large He salutes his busted clan “I may flop But that's what I planed” Every flop He fist-pumps higher “I failed so hard I might be fire” Tapes a gold star on his own hand “Best villain Badfatler -- that’s the brand” [End]