You Had to Get the Biggest One?

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V4.5-ALL

[Intro – Semi arriving]
[Truck brakes hiss]
[Rowdy – Male, upbeat, confident, goofy] We made it. Tractor pull.
[Crosswire – Male, dry, skeptical, deadpan] Three-day weekend.
[Rowdy] Finally.
[Truck door slams]
[Bammer – Male, deep, practical, matter-of-fact] There they are!
[Rowdy] Bammer?
[Benny – Male, energetic, cheerful, excitable] You made it!
[Crosswire] Benny?
[Rowdy] What are you two doing here?
[Bammer] Oversized load team. Management sent us.
[Benny] This thing's too big for you two.
[Rowdy] We have CDLs.
[Bammer] That's why you're driving.
[Crosswire] We're not going to hit anything.
[Bammer] That's what everyone says.
[Music begins]
[Verse 1]
Down the highway, Rolling slow, Four warehouse cats in a convoy.
Company truck, Company fuel, Three-day weekend looking cool.
[Rowdy] We got the tractor here.
[Bammer] You were told to deliver it to the tractor pull.
[Crosswire] Yes. That's where we're going.
[Beat]
[Bammer] Interesting.
[Rowdy] What?
[Benny] He's saying it like that.
[Verse 2]
[Chains rattle]
[Rowdy] Okay, let's unload.
[Bammer] Wait.
[Crosswire] What?
[Bammer] You had to get the biggest one?
[Rowdy] What?
[Bammer] Out of every tractor?
[Crosswire] He didn't pick it.
[Rowdy] We both picked it.
[Benny] You picked THAT?
[Beat]
[Rowdy] It's a good tractor.
[Bammer] It's enormous.
[Crosswire] That's why we rented it.
[Bammer] Why?
[Rowdy] For the tractor pull.
[Benny] Oh.
[Beat]
[Bammer] This is the tractor you're delivering to the tractor pull.
[Rowdy] Yeah.
[Bammer] Where you're going for your three-day weekend.
[Crosswire] Yeah.
[Long pause]
[Benny] Guys.
[Crosswire] What?
[Benny] I think you're the customer.
[Music stops]
[Rowdy] Wait.
[Crosswire] We're the customer?
[Bammer] You rented it to compete.
[Crosswire] And Aisle Blue paid us to deliver it here.
[Beat]
[Crosswire] We got paid to bring our own tractor to our vacation.
[Benny] That's the most Aisle Blue thing I've ever heard.
[Chorus]
We rented a tractor, Then we drove it here.
Aisle Blue paid the mileage, And they bought the gear.
We thought we had a delivery, We thought we'd drop it off.
But now we're standing at the pull, And we're already in the show!
[Bammer] You're in it.
[Rowdy] Oh.
[Crosswire] Right.
[Verse 3]
[Benny] So when do you compete?
[Crosswire] Check the paperwork.
[Paper rustling]
[Crosswire] Here. Registration.
[Benny] You're registered.
[Rowdy] We're registered?
[Bammer] You didn't know?
[Crosswire] We knew we rented a tractor and were going to the tractor pull.
[Bammer] You didn't know you were bringing the tractor?
[Rowdy] We thought Aisle Blue was.
[Long pause]
[Bammer] You are Aisle Blue.
[Crosswire] Not technically.
[Bammer] You work there.
[Crosswire] That's different.
[Verse 4]
[Music builds]
[Benny] Where's your competition gear?
[Rowdy] What gear?
[Crosswire] I have mine.
[Rowdy] Since when?
[Crosswire] Since I got it.
[Bammer] What is Crosswire wearing?
[Crosswire] Safety equipment.
[Benny] That's not safety equipment.
[Crosswire] Competition safety gear.
[Rowdy] Why does it say Forklift Yacht Club?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Bammer] Aisle Blue?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Benny] Claw Paradise?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Bammer] 5 Claw Knives and Goods?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Rowdy] Laizer Air?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Benny] Hair of the Dawg?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Bammer] That's a beach bar.
[Crosswire] They sponsored me.
[Benny] The Tuna Co.?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Rowdy] Surf Breaker?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Bammer] Purrfect Waves?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Benny] The Rusty Deck?
[Crosswire] Sponsor.
[Beat]
[Rowdy] How many sponsors do you have?
[Crosswire] Enough.
[Bammer] Did any pay you?
[Crosswire] We're about to find out.
[Final Chorus]
We rented a tractor, And now we're in the show!
We brought our competition On a company cargo load!
Four cats, One tractor, One oversized machine!
And Crosswire's wearing Every sponsor he's ever seen!
[Announcer – Male, booming, enthusiastic] NEXT UP! ROWDY AND CROSSWIRE!
[Beat]
[Bammer] We're not competing.
[Benny] We're not competing.
[Announcer] ROWDY AND CROSSWIRE!
[Bammer] You're competing.
[Crosswire] We're competing.
[Rowdy] Three-day weekend.
[Crosswire] Three-day weekend.
[Tractor engine roars]
[Rowdy] You had to get the biggest one?
[Crosswire] You picked it.
[Rowdy] We picked it.
[Crosswire] Then let's pull.
[Tractor roars louder]
[End]

4346/7500

[Intro – Semi arriving] [Truck brakes hiss] [Rowdy – Male, upbeat, confident, goofy] We made it. Tractor pull. [Crosswire – Male, dry, skeptical, deadpan] Three-day weekend. [Rowdy] Finally. [Truck door slams] [Bammer – Male, deep, practical, matter-of-fact] There they are! [Rowdy] Bammer? [Benny – Male, energetic, cheerful, excitable] You made it! [Crosswire] Benny? [Rowdy] What are you two doing here? [Bammer] Oversized load team. Management sent us. [Benny] This thing's too big for you two. [Rowdy] We have CDLs. [Bammer] That's why you're driving. [Crosswire] We're not going to hit anything. [Bammer] That's what everyone says. [Music begins] [Verse 1] Down the highway, Rolling slow, Four warehouse cats in a convoy. Company truck, Company fuel, Three-day weekend looking cool. [Rowdy] We got the tractor here. [Bammer] You were told to deliver it to the tractor pull. [Crosswire] Yes. That's where we're going. [Beat] [Bammer] Interesting. [Rowdy] What? [Benny] He's saying it like that. [Verse 2] [Chains rattle] [Rowdy] Okay, let's unload. [Bammer] Wait. [Crosswire] What? [Bammer] You had to get the biggest one? [Rowdy] What? [Bammer] Out of every tractor? [Crosswire] He didn't pick it. [Rowdy] We both picked it. [Benny] You picked THAT? [Beat] [Rowdy] It's a good tractor. [Bammer] It's enormous. [Crosswire] That's why we rented it. [Bammer] Why? [Rowdy] For the tractor pull. [Benny] Oh. [Beat] [Bammer] This is the tractor you're delivering to the tractor pull. [Rowdy] Yeah. [Bammer] Where you're going for your three-day weekend. [Crosswire] Yeah. [Long pause] [Benny] Guys. [Crosswire] What? [Benny] I think you're the customer. [Music stops] [Rowdy] Wait. [Crosswire] We're the customer? [Bammer] You rented it to compete. [Crosswire] And Aisle Blue paid us to deliver it here. [Beat] [Crosswire] We got paid to bring our own tractor to our vacation. [Benny] That's the most Aisle Blue thing I've ever heard. [Chorus] We rented a tractor, Then we drove it here. Aisle Blue paid the mileage, And they bought the gear. We thought we had a delivery, We thought we'd drop it off. But now we're standing at the pull, And we're already in the show! [Bammer] You're in it. [Rowdy] Oh. [Crosswire] Right. [Verse 3] [Benny] So when do you compete? [Crosswire] Check the paperwork. [Paper rustling] [Crosswire] Here. Registration. [Benny] You're registered. [Rowdy] We're registered? [Bammer] You didn't know? [Crosswire] We knew we rented a tractor and were going to the tractor pull. [Bammer] You didn't know you were bringing the tractor? [Rowdy] We thought Aisle Blue was. [Long pause] [Bammer] You are Aisle Blue. [Crosswire] Not technically. [Bammer] You work there. [Crosswire] That's different. [Verse 4] [Music builds] [Benny] Where's your competition gear? [Rowdy] What gear? [Crosswire] I have mine. [Rowdy] Since when? [Crosswire] Since I got it. [Bammer] What is Crosswire wearing? [Crosswire] Safety equipment. [Benny] That's not safety equipment. [Crosswire] Competition safety gear. [Rowdy] Why does it say Forklift Yacht Club? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Bammer] Aisle Blue? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Benny] Claw Paradise? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Bammer] 5 Claw Knives and Goods? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Rowdy] Laizer Air? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Benny] Hair of the Dawg? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Bammer] That's a beach bar. [Crosswire] They sponsored me. [Benny] The Tuna Co.? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Rowdy] Surf Breaker? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Bammer] Purrfect Waves? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Benny] The Rusty Deck? [Crosswire] Sponsor. [Beat] [Rowdy] How many sponsors do you have? [Crosswire] Enough. [Bammer] Did any pay you? [Crosswire] We're about to find out. [Final Chorus] We rented a tractor, And now we're in the show! We brought our competition On a company cargo load! Four cats, One tractor, One oversized machine! And Crosswire's wearing Every sponsor he's ever seen! [Announcer – Male, booming, enthusiastic] NEXT UP! ROWDY AND CROSSWIRE! [Beat] [Bammer] We're not competing. [Benny] We're not competing. [Announcer] ROWDY AND CROSSWIRE! [Bammer] You're competing. [Crosswire] We're competing. [Rowdy] Three-day weekend. [Crosswire] Three-day weekend. [Tractor engine roars] [Rowdy] You had to get the biggest one? [Crosswire] You picked it. [Rowdy] We picked it. [Crosswire] Then let's pull. [Tractor roars louder] [End]

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