My books are open but my mind is gone, Chalk dust dreams where I don’t belong. Mama’s voice feels far away, Like an echo from another day. I try to listen, I really do, But my thoughts are louder than the rules. I’m not broken, I’m just changing shape, Learning how much space I’m allowed to take. I’m standing on the edge of who I was, And who I’m told that I should become. I don’t want to hurt, I don’t want to fight, But I won’t stay quiet just to be polite. I’m still a child, but I feel too much, Dreaming of hands I’ve never touched. I want the world to know my name, To love me wild, to love me brave. I roll my eyes, I slam the door, Say things I’ve never said before. It’s not that I don’t care at all, I just can’t live inside these walls. Their faces blur, their words collide, All I see are boys passing by. It scares me how my heart can race, For a smile, for a passing face. I’m standing on the edge of who I was, And who I’m told that I should become. I don’t want to hurt, I don’t want to lie, But I won’t shrink just to survive. I’m still a child, still learning why, I want to fly but I’m afraid of the sky. I want to be seen, I want to be chosen, Loved completely, never unnoticed. Some days I want to be held like before, Some days I want so much more. I want freedom, I want control, I want every heart to feel my soul. Don’t tell me “wait”, don’t tell me “soon”, I need the sun, I need the moon. I know they love me, I know they try, I see the worry in their eyes. I’ll come back home, but hear me say: I need to lose myself to find my way. I’m standing in the space between, The girl I was and the woman in me. Love me loudly, love me true, I won’t accept a smaller view. I want the world, I want it now, I want every star to know somehow: I’m still becoming, can’t you see? I’m everything I’m meant to be. Between the bell and the open sky, I’m learning how to say goodbye.
