If the Dog Don't Like You (Fuck Off)

You came through the front door You said hello to me You shook my hand and smiled You acted friendly My dog looked at you once Then went for a pee I don't know what you did to him But that's enough for me He doesn't need a reason He doesn't need a chart He takes one look at someone And knows them from the start If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off You can make your excuses You can talk all you want If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off He don't need an explanation He don't need to hear your side If the dog don't like you— FUCK OFF! You said the dog was stupid You said he needed training You said he'd learn to like you If I stopped complaining He growled when you got closer He showed you all his teeth You said that he was jealous I said, "Get off my street" You brought a bag of bones You tried to win his favor He sniffed them for a second Then said 'That's not my flavor.' You said you had a dog once You said you understood He shit beside your brand new shoes I thought that was pretty good He doesn't care about your money He doesn't care who's who He doesn't care what you drive He just doesn't like you If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off You can make your excuses You can talk all you want If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off He don't need an explanation He don't need to hear your side If the dog don't like you— FUCK OFF! My neighbor said you're harmless My brother said you're fine My mother said you're charming My dog said, "Not this time" You told me everybody likes you You said the dog was wrong He barked when you were leaving And wagged his tail when you were gone Maybe dogs are stupid Maybe dogs are smart Maybe they can see the asshole Before you see the part You can fool a lot of people You can fool me for a while But my dog can smell a bullshit artist No mater how you smile You asked me why he hates you I told you I don't know You said I should control him I said, "There's the fucking door" You started getting angry You said that I was rude My dog sat down beside me Like he approved my mood Maybe he can smell it Maybe he can see Maybe he knows exactly What you're trying to hide from me If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off You can make your excuses You can talk all you want If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off He don't need an explanation He don't need to hear your side If the dog don't like you— FUCK OFF! So when you meet my dog Don't take it personally If he likes you, that's a good sign If he doesn't, let him be You can shake my hand You can tell me you're great But if that dog starts growling I don't give a shit how long you wait If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off You can make your excuses You can talk all you want If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off If the dog don't like you, fuck off He don't need an explanation He don't need to hear your side If the dog don't like you— FUCK OFF! If the dog don't like you— FUCK OFF!