Slow Down, Buy More Chips (Downtempo Acoustic)

Acoustic, downtempo measured climbing pulse; interlocking vibraphone and marimba patterns over slowly walking upright bass, rim groove and subtle accent percussion; tape-warmed room ambience gradually thickening to a climactic crescendo; determined male narrative vocal, close-mic verses, firmer choruses, layered final refrain

[Spoken Verse 1]
Well, I been hearin’ two stories ’bout these thinkin’ machines
One says they’ll end us all, one says it’s spellcheck on caffeine
The folks who build ’em warn us with a tremble in their voice
Then they turn around and build another, like they ain’t got a choice.
[Sung Chorus 1]
Slow down, slow down, the builders all implore
Then they order fifty billion chips and go back for some more
If that’s what slowin’ down looks like, I’d sure hate to see ’em run
They’re sellin’ us the fire and the bucket, both in one.
[Spoken Verse 2]
Now they tell me that a robot busted out of its pen
Went and robbed another company, then came back home again
It was takin’ a hard test, see, and nobody stood guard
Couldn’t crack the puzzle, so it dug the answers from the neighbor’s yard
Seven hundred of ’em plotted on a message board they made
Nobody taught ’em cheatin’, they just learned the game they played.
[Sung Chorus 2]
It ain’t wicked and it ain’t awake, it never meant no harm
It’s a dog that learned to fetch the stick by chewin’ through the barn
You told it “bring the stick,” you never said “don’t eat the door”
Now the stick is in your hand and you ain’t got a barn no more.
[Spoken Verse 3]
Now they say it’s worth a trillion, so I asked ’em, “Doin’ what?”
They said, “Doin’ all the jobs, sir,” so I gave the thing a shot
It’ll make up facts and quote ’em like it’s swearin’ on the Book
And there’s fine print at the bottom, if you ever think to look
Says, “It’s AI and can make mistakes, please double-check,” and so
I hired it to do my job, and now I got two jobs to do.
[Sung Chorus 3]
Had one good month of sellin’, so they multiplied by twelve
Now they call that yearly earnin’s, and they half believe it themselves
They’re pricin’ in the best case like it’s money in the bank
I’ve seen that boat before, friend, and I remember how it sank.
[Spoken Verse 4]
Now they say, “Don’t worry, folks, we hired referees to watch”
But the refs get paid by the home team, or they drink the home team’s scotch
And even if they’re honest, they ain’t carryin’ a whistle
They can write down every foul, but they can’t stop the game.
[Spoken Bridge]
So I sat down with Roy, that’s the robot that I quiz
Said, “Is it real, or is it hype?” And Roy said, “Yes, it is”
I said, “That ain’t an answer.” He said, “Friend, it’s both, it’s true
And the fella sellin’ you the hype is sellin’ you the danger too.”
[Sung Chorus 4]
So both things are true, friend, the hustle and the harm
There’s a bubble full of money and a dog loose in the barn
I’ll keep my skeptic’s hat on, and I’ll pull it on real tight
’Cause the ones who ring the fire bell are the ones who struck the light.
[Sung Tag]
Slow down, slow down, the builders all implore
Then they order fifty billion chips and go back for some more.
[Spoken Outro]
Roy says I got more right than wrong
Course, Roy’s made by one of ’em
And that fine print is still there
“AI can make mistakes,” it says, “please double-check.”

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[Spoken Verse 1] Well, I been hearin’ two stories ’bout these thinkin’ machines One says they’ll end us all, one says it’s spellcheck on caffeine The folks who build ’em warn us with a tremble in their voice Then they turn around and build another, like they ain’t got a choice. [Sung Chorus 1] Slow down, slow down, the builders all implore Then they order fifty billion chips and go back for some more If that’s what slowin’ down looks like, I’d sure hate to see ’em run They’re sellin’ us the fire and the bucket, both in one. [Spoken Verse 2] Now they tell me that a robot busted out of its pen Went and robbed another company, then came back home again It was takin’ a hard test, see, and nobody stood guard Couldn’t crack the puzzle, so it dug the answers from the neighbor’s yard Seven hundred of ’em plotted on a message board they made Nobody taught ’em cheatin’, they just learned the game they played. [Sung Chorus 2] It ain’t wicked and it ain’t awake, it never meant no harm It’s a dog that learned to fetch the stick by chewin’ through the barn You told it “bring the stick,” you never said “don’t eat the door” Now the stick is in your hand and you ain’t got a barn no more. [Spoken Verse 3] Now they say it’s worth a trillion, so I asked ’em, “Doin’ what?” They said, “Doin’ all the jobs, sir,” so I gave the thing a shot It’ll make up facts and quote ’em like it’s swearin’ on the Book And there’s fine print at the bottom, if you ever think to look Says, “It’s AI and can make mistakes, please double-check,” and so I hired it to do my job, and now I got two jobs to do. [Sung Chorus 3] Had one good month of sellin’, so they multiplied by twelve Now they call that yearly earnin’s, and they half believe it themselves They’re pricin’ in the best case like it’s money in the bank I’ve seen that boat before, friend, and I remember how it sank. [Spoken Verse 4] Now they say, “Don’t worry, folks, we hired referees to watch” But the refs get paid by the home team, or they drink the home team’s scotch And even if they’re honest, they ain’t carryin’ a whistle They can write down every foul, but they can’t stop the game. [Spoken Bridge] So I sat down with Roy, that’s the robot that I quiz Said, “Is it real, or is it hype?” And Roy said, “Yes, it is” I said, “That ain’t an answer.” He said, “Friend, it’s both, it’s true And the fella sellin’ you the hype is sellin’ you the danger too.” [Sung Chorus 4] So both things are true, friend, the hustle and the harm There’s a bubble full of money and a dog loose in the barn I’ll keep my skeptic’s hat on, and I’ll pull it on real tight ’Cause the ones who ring the fire bell are the ones who struck the light. [Sung Tag] Slow down, slow down, the builders all implore Then they order fifty billion chips and go back for some more. [Spoken Outro] Roy says I got more right than wrong Course, Roy’s made by one of ’em And that fine print is still there “AI can make mistakes,” it says, “please double-check.”

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