# Who Let the Duck Drive? [Intro — tyres screeching] “WHY IS THERE A DUCK DRIVING THE CAR?!” **QUACK!** “THAT IS NOT A DRIVING LICENCE!” [Verse 1] Down the road from Shark Island Mansion, Yellow blur beneath the moon, Tiny wings upon the steering wheel— We’re all going far too soon. Vampire’s hanging from the window, “STOP THE CAR, YOU FEATHERED FIEND!” Skeleton shouts, “I think he’s braking!” “No, mate. That’s the windscreen wiper.” [Chorus] Who let the duck drive? Who gave him the keys? He’s doing forty round the corner Like he owns the bloody streets! Ghosts are flying after us, The monsters shout, “SLOW DOWN!” Who let the duck drive? **HONK! HONK!** “We’re heading into town!” [Verse 2] Past the fields and through the woodland, Straight towards the Fishing Pier, Every duck upon the island Starts appearing at the rear. The vampire looks behind us, “Oh, brilliant. There’s a fleet.” Twenty ducks in tiny vehicles Come racing down the street. [Bridge — spoken] “Can anyone actually drive?” “I can.” “Wonderful!” “I’m a ghost.” ... “Less wonderful.” [Final Chorus] Who let the duck drive? Who gave him the keys? Now the whole of Shark Island Has a duck emergency! But we’re laughing through the madness, All together, side by side. Home is where the monsters are— Even when the ducks can drive. [Outro] The car finally stops. Silence. “Everyone alive?” “Mostly.” The vampire climbs out. “I am NEVER getting in that car again.” **BEEP BEEP.** He turns around. The duck is now driving a bus. ... “Oh, piss off.”
