Absolute Truth

Gather around, friends of all I have to tell you the news It was told by my father And his father before… I am so lucky to Be born into this place Because unlike all of you We are blessed with holy grace! [Chorus] I was born with the absolute truth And everybody else is wrong If you don’t want to burn in hell You better come, and sing along We just so happen… To hold the absolute truth Even if there are billions What they know… is absolute wrong [Verse] If you need to see some proof I have this book that says I’m right It’s written in here it is the truth Circular logic, what is that? In all the places I could be born I truly won the holy ticket Anywhere else on the planet You know they're just dirty heretic [Chorus] I was born with the absolute truth And everybody else is wrong If you don’t want to burn in hell You better come, and sing along We just so happen… To hold the absolute truth Even if there are billions What they know… is absolute wrong [Solo] [Bridge] Underneath it all, we love everybody They simply need to be... Part of the... Roman Catholic Church of the Only Truly Correct Interpretation of the Third pentescostal denomination fourth apostle Corner of 4th and Vine South-East Side Behind Tony’s Pizza Near the Broken Street Lamp Neighborhood of Saint Doubting Thomas Blessed City of Scrupulousville Pennsylvania! [Chorus] I was born with the absolute truth And everybody else is wrong If you don’t want to burn in hell You better come, and sing along We just so happen… To hold the absolute truth Even if there are billions What they know… is absolute wrong [Outro] Everybody else... Can burn in hell.... [End]