[Verse 1] Before I knew the names of colors, I knew the shape of six white strings. The world arrived to me in fragments; Music gathered everything. Before I understood what silence Could be used to hide away, I sang before I spoke in sentences. Music taught me what to say. [Verse 2] Then someone learned that I loved music And made himself a part of it. Every week, his hands made beauty; Mine learned what came after it. I learned a song could sound like safety While my body learned to brace. He never had to take the music— He just made it feel unsafe. [Chorus] Sometimes the guitar weighs more than the world When I lift it to my chest. Not because it’s made of maple— Because my body won’t forget. The alphabet my soul was written in Became the language of my fear. Imagine losing your first language While every word is still right here. [Verse 3] Shelby never did a thing to me, Still my hands can pull away. They know exactly where the chords are; They just don’t know if they’re safe. That’s the cruelty of remembering: Knowing he is nowhere near, Knowing this is only music, Still expecting him to appear. [Bridge] He did not give me music. It was mine before his name. He found the thing that made me brightest And tuned its strings to shame. So I hold her without playing, Let the silence take its time. Let my fingers find the fretboard Without asking them to climb. There is healing in returning Without needing to perform. Maybe home is not a place you find— Maybe it’s a sound reborn. [Final Chorus] Sometimes the guitar weighs more than the world When I lift it to my chest. But I don’t have to play it perfectly To know that it’s still mine to press. The alphabet my soul was written in Was never his to rearrange. I did not lose my first language— I learned to speak it through the pain. And someday when I reach for Shelby, My hands won’t have to count the cost. I’ll play one chord and finally hear it: Nothing that was mine was lost. Music knew me before the hurting. It remembers who I was. I don’t have to find my way back to it. It has been here all along.
