I want to be clear about what this is. What you’re about to hear is not a story about addiction. It’s an account of what it feels like to live inside it. These songs were written from lived experience — from the perspective of a mind slowly shaped by dependence. Not all at once. Not dramatically. But quietly, over time. This work reflects my own experience. It also reflects the experience of my lifelong friend, Chris, whose path followed a similar direction. I survived. He didn’t. What you’re about to hear is not told with distance or hindsight. It’s told as it felt in the moment — when relief looked like strength, and control felt like survival. Some of this may sound calm. Some of it may sound convincing. That is not accidental. If you choose to continue, please listen in order. This is how it began. I was only ten.
