The Neon Lies Kindly

[Verse 1] I keep turning off the lights Like darkness might be honest Like if I make the room go black I’ll stop dressing wounds as omens But the sign outside keeps flickering Pink mercy on the floor Making halos out of damage Making chapels out of more [Pre-Chorus] And I know the glow is lying I know it softens every bruise But I am tired of clean endings I am tired of ugly truths So let the city make it pretty Let it stain me blue and red I don’t need it to mean something I just need somewhere to st[Pre-Chorus] And I know the glow is lying I know it softens every bruise But I am tired of clean endings I am tired of ugly truths So let the city make it pretty Let it stain me blue and red I don’t need it to mean something I just need somewhere to stand [Chorus] The neon lies kindly And I believe it for a minute Maybe I showed too much of me Maybe just enough to mean it I keep turning off the lights But the colour finds me anyway I still want to be near the glow I just don’t ask it to stay [Verse 2] I won’t name what I was reaching for I’ve named enough already Some doors don’t have to hate you Just to stay closed when you’re ready And it hurts like being stupid Though I know I’m not a fool I can be lonely without being worthless I can be jealous without being cruel There’s a brightness I keep orbiting Like a moth that learned restraint I don’t touch the pretty burning I just let it know my face [Pre-Chorus] And I know it can’t hold me I know it cannot choose But I am still here in its weather Still gentler than I want to So let the streetlight make a saint Of what I cannot save I don’t need a revelation I just need to be okay [Chorus] The neon lies kindly And I believe it for a minute Maybe I showed too much of me Maybe just enough to mean it I keep turning off the lights But the colour finds me anyway I still want to be near the glow I just don’t ask it to stay [Bridge] I have given up on answers But not the ache beneath the glass I have given up on wanting less It never listened when I asked I have given up on being chosen Like it proves that I was real But I have not stopped turning toward The only warmth I feel So leave the sign on in the window Let it flicker, let it lie I won’t call it hope tonight I’ll only call it light [Final Chorus] The neon lies kindly And I believe it for a minute Maybe I showed too much of me Maybe just enough to mean it I keep turning off the lights But the colour finds me anyway I still want to be near the glow I just don’t ask it to stay The neon lies kindly It makes mercy out of rain I don’t expect the light to love me I just stand there all the same [Outro] I keep turning off the lights But the sign keeps bleeding through I don’t call it coming back I just know I wanted to