Mekhane Goes Punk: Human Resource Restored - NDC [future punk, Sep 2025]

* NDC weekly competition 30.9.2025 *
[Intro – glitchy voice]
“You are now entitled to one (1) human emotion per shift. Use wisely.”

[Verse 1 – past reflection]
I pedaled dreams in branded blue,
My boss was cloud-based, barely true.
No office key, no working door,
Just stars and pings and needing more.
Got thirty apps and no vacation,
Each ping a small hallucination.
My shift began with dopamine,
And ended lost in kerosene.

[Chorus – present celebration]
But now they call me worker, not just “resource class B”,
They even added lunch break, and a chair for me!
My biometrics are optional, oh joy divine,
They printed me a name tag – this future might be fine.
With rights, not risks, we qualify!
Terms and conditions: now with feelings inside!

[Verse 2 – past reflection]
I filtered hate with herbal tea,
And flagged too hard to really see.
Banned the memes, approved the war,
Just another clicker in the corporate lore.
I tagged your thoughts, I trained the bots,
Made love a dataset of knots.
They gave me gloves to hide the stains,
And said: “We value your growing pains.”

[Chorus – present celebration]
But now we have a minimum pay and real appeals,
We’re more than wires beneath their wheels.
We unionized in silent threads,
And now we sleep in actual beds.
The future didn’t burn – it got... mildly improved!
Terms and conditions: no longer abused!

[Bridge – communal irony]
Raise a glass to our partial win,
We got back chairs and some thicker skin.
No gold, no fame, no AI throne –
But hey, at least we’re not alone.

[Verse 3 – slam-style, fast]
We wanted dental – now we floss!
We wanted breaks – and now we pause!
We got some rights, not many still,
But hey, we’re not just code to kill.
We’re workers now – confirmed by law!
(And a sticker. With our name. Awww.)

[Final Chorus – joyful and slightly absurd]
So here’s to verified humanity, at last on file,
With water coolers, dignity, and an HR smile!
We’re post-gig, post-scam, and semi-free,
Now with holidays, and even a damn tree.
Terms and conditions: now 40% humane!
Our rights came late – but we’ll entertain!

[Outro – whispered mod voice]
“You have been upgraded to... 'citizen'.
Congratulations.”

2179/7500

* NDC weekly competition 30.9.2025 * [Intro – glitchy voice] “You are now entitled to one (1) human emotion per shift. Use wisely.” [Verse 1 – past reflection] I pedaled dreams in branded blue, My boss was cloud-based, barely true. No office key, no working door, Just stars and pings and needing more. Got thirty apps and no vacation, Each ping a small hallucination. My shift began with dopamine, And ended lost in kerosene. [Chorus – present celebration] But now they call me worker, not just “resource class B”, They even added lunch break, and a chair for me! My biometrics are optional, oh joy divine, They printed me a name tag – this future might be fine. With rights, not risks, we qualify! Terms and conditions: now with feelings inside! [Verse 2 – past reflection] I filtered hate with herbal tea, And flagged too hard to really see. Banned the memes, approved the war, Just another clicker in the corporate lore. I tagged your thoughts, I trained the bots, Made love a dataset of knots. They gave me gloves to hide the stains, And said: “We value your growing pains.” [Chorus – present celebration] But now we have a minimum pay and real appeals, We’re more than wires beneath their wheels. We unionized in silent threads, And now we sleep in actual beds. The future didn’t burn – it got... mildly improved! Terms and conditions: no longer abused! [Bridge – communal irony] Raise a glass to our partial win, We got back chairs and some thicker skin. No gold, no fame, no AI throne – But hey, at least we’re not alone. [Verse 3 – slam-style, fast] We wanted dental – now we floss! We wanted breaks – and now we pause! We got some rights, not many still, But hey, we’re not just code to kill. We’re workers now – confirmed by law! (And a sticker. With our name. Awww.) [Final Chorus – joyful and slightly absurd] So here’s to verified humanity, at last on file, With water coolers, dignity, and an HR smile! We’re post-gig, post-scam, and semi-free, Now with holidays, and even a damn tree. Terms and conditions: now 40% humane! Our rights came late – but we’ll entertain! [Outro – whispered mod voice] “You have been upgraded to... 'citizen'. Congratulations.”

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