Do Not Feed

Do not feed Do not feed That’s how it starts First it was nothing just a spark in the throat just a clean little urge with its teeth out of sight just a “why not” with a nice straight face just enough bad timing to feel like fate You let it sit longer gave it room in your head fed it one small inch then another instead one little secret one beautiful excuse now it knows your timing now it knows where to bruise It doesn’t get kinder it just gets concealed learns the shape of your silence learns the places you yield every time you indulge it it sharpens its aim every time you forgive it it comes back renamed One taste two more there goes the floor you swear you feel it stop and then it starts again behind your teeth Do not feed it grows teeth when it grows gets a little more lovely every time it gets control do not feed it remembers the weak finds the softest part of you and settles in your bones Do not feed it likes want, it likes heat likes the sound of self-control coming apart at the seams do not feed it gets bold when you keep acting like the hungriest part of you is something you can keep Now it sounds like reason now it wears your voice now it enters the room like it came by choice all calm in the mouth all clean in the lies with that “I’m still small” kind of civilized smile You kept calling it temporary kept calling it light kept saying you had it exactly where you liked now it shows up early now it stays too late now it eats through the part of you that still hesitates It gets dressed in your logic it gets fed by delay gets stronger every time you look the other way and all the little mercies you thought made you kind just built it a staircase right into your mind One touch new teeth one spark no sleep you swear you own the switch somehow it doesn’t even ask you now Do not feed it grows teeth when it grows gets a little more lovely every time it gets control do not feed it remembers the weak finds the softest part of you and settles in your bones Do not feed it likes want, it likes heat likes the sound of self-control coming apart at the seams do not feed it gets bold when you keep acting like the hungriest part of you is something you can keep Small when you name it huge when it stays sweet in the story worse in the ways Call it a weakness call it a phase watch how it fattens on all that grace Smile while it feeds say it feels fine then watch that little mercy come back with your spine Go on call it a flaw call it a phase call it whatever helps soften the blame Go on move it an inch say it still fits tell me what part of this still sounds harmless Do not feed it grows teeth when it grows gets a little more lovely every time it gets control do not feed it remembers the weak finds the softest part of you and settles in your bones Do not feed it likes want, it likes heat likes the sound of self-control coming apart at the seams do not feed for all that you keep the hungriest part of you was never the part you could keep Do not feed Do not feed That’s how it starts