🪱Night Crawler🪱

I feel the nights crawl… slow nights crawl, each breath pulling less in my lungs. Running hot… losing steam, every thought turning you to a fiend. Take a step… take the hit, cut your hand just to feel you exist. Take a step… shoot it in, lose the ground… lose your shit. Lying to yourself saying that you’ll quit. Nights crawl… slow nights crawl… any hour you’re coming undone. Down the stairs… underground, trying hard not to ever come down. Put your hand on your heart, feel it shake in the dark. Do it once… do it twice… like a habit you can’t fight. Do it once… do it twice… then again ‘til it takes control of your life. Every hour, that’s your right. Tell yourself you won’t do it tonight. Running fast… crashing out.. tell yourself you won’t do it tonight. But then you do it again. Yeah…. you do it again. Any hour… if you break, tell yourself you won’t do it again. Every hour… wide awake, bet you swear you won’t do it again. Body shivers… your hands shake… Feeling alive but know it won’t last. Lose yourself… lose your place, The next fix is pulling you back. You said calm… you said wait, but the choice was already made. Try to stand… try to breathe… every stand you take… it comes in too late. You lie and swear never again, but it never ends. Everything is a mess Because you do it again… You do it again… You do it again and again and again and again… YEAH!!!! YOU DO IT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And again and again and again and again…..