At quarter after three! I opened the fridge to drink some wine! But I was out of milk! It was a Sunday No chance for delivery! So I looked in the mirror And saw my own reflection And for maybe one or was it two moments I felt bravery surge up in me! I put my shoes decidedly Even found back my lost keys Opened the door Today is the day Till I saw a man walking casually! Oh no! What if he says hello? (Then just answer in kind!) But What if I say it weird!? (Then you'll still be fine!) And if he ask how I'm doing!? (Just believe in yourself!) No but what if he thinks I'm a creep for not greeting properly? (Ah, fuck it, go to hell!) Wait! Wait! Come back! [Chorus] Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) The sky is way too fucking wide! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) The sidewalk keeps going on for miles And my neighbors give me unsettling smiles Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) And I have been for a while! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) But maybe today I can try! I cracked the door an inch or two The neighborhood was bright and blue My neighbor said, “Hey! What lovely weather today!” And I said, You too!” immediately I don't think that's how you do Got a frowned look like I stole their shoe My foot then crossed the welcome mat And somehow my world did not collapse I heard a dog barked outside the fence Alright let's give this outdoor thingy a chance! [Chorus] Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) The sky is way too fucking bright! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) People look at me like I'm not alright When I try to use the trees to hide! Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) And I have been for a while! Ooooo, oo-ooooo) But maybe today I'll reach the mailbox before night! Ohhh, it was a lovely morning So sunny my skin was screaming! My paleness was reflecting! Enough to be called blinding! I'm on a sidewalk's full of strangers Who all seem to know where they're going Nodding at me like captains Then squinting as I ran away from them! A pigeon landed 2 feet from my shoe With the confidence of king portaloo I kneeled before my liege While the mailguy laughed and filmed! Meow-ow! I see cats on every street! Woooof-ouf! And I see dogs walking in leash! Held by strangers all wearing tiny hats Did I miss some new social contract!? Wait...I don't even know where I'm at! [Chorus] Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) The clouds are way too fucking white! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) Every damn street looks alike! And I think I've crossed those ravens twice! Ohhh! I'm afraid of going outside! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) And I have been for a while! (Ooooo, oo-ooooo) But hopefully today I'll survive! "Where was I even going..... oh right! The store... needed milk.... what for? Wine? Why would I need milk for wine?"
