[Verse 1] I’m just a cockroach named Fernando, Living underneath your fridge alone, I recycle crumbs, I clean at night… Yet humans scream like I started fights. One lady saw me near the sink, Dropped her soup and fainted instantly, Sir, I was carrying a bread crumb home… And honestly minding my own business. [Pre-Chorus] I have feelings. Tiny bug feelings. You ever think about THAT before the screaming starts? [Chorus] I’m just a cockroach with a gentle soul, Trying to survive beneath the stove, But every time I say hello… Someone grabs a shoe and loses control. I may have six weird little feet, And antennae that twitch when we meet, But deep inside beneath this shell… I crochet and care for others well. [Verse 2] I rescued Gary from a sticky trap, Held his tiny hand during the aftermath, We cried together near the beans… Then got chased by a broomstick wielding teen. I wrote poetry inside the wall, “Moonlight whispers through drywall,” But Susan said, “That’s deeply gross.” Susan has no artistic soul. [Pre-Chorus] Humans say, “Ew! Kill it now!” Meanwhile I’ve seen YOU eat cold spaghetti from the sink at 2AM. [Chorus] I’m just a cockroach misunderstood, I’d hug you gently if I could, But every time I crawl nearby… You launch a chair and call the FBI. I don’t spread evil, hate, or doom, I just rent space beneath your room, And yes okay I touched your spoon… But emotionally I’ve grown since June. [Bridge] One night I saved a baby moth, From drowning in barbecue sauce, Then helped a lonely silverfish… Through a difficult emotional divorce. I volunteer at bug soup kitchens, Care for ants with tiny mittens, And every Christmas all us roaches… Sing Mariah Carey near the rotting peaches. [Verse 3] Then one small girl looked down at me, Instead of screaming brutally, She whispered softly, “Hi there bug…” And gave me half a chicken nug. I cried so hard my legs gave out, Fernando finally felt seen somehow, No screaming, shoes, or flying crocs… Just kindness shared between two worlds. [Final Chorus] I’m just a cockroach with a dream, To not die instantly when seen, Maybe someday humans learn… That even weird bugs have concerns. I still live under your old fridge door, But now I’m feared a little less than before, And every night I smile with pride… Eating nuggets with my new tiny human ally. [Final Line] …Also Gary’s stuck in the glue trap again.
