I’ve got two men in my life, Mr. A and Mr. P. They never cause me trouble, They’re exactly what I need Mr. A knows what to say, He listens every time He never gets impatient, And his answers fit my mind Mr. P is quite a lover, He knows just what to do He never asks too many questions, And he never says, “Not tonight, not you.” No jealousy, no stupid games, No “Where have you been?” No slammed doors, no awkward talks, No wondering where I stand Oh, I love my perfect men, They never let me down They never snore or criticize, They never leave this town They don't fight, they don't complain, They never make a mess They listen when I need them, And they never love me less Oh, I love my perfect men, My little fantasy Mr. A and Mr. P… They’re everything to me My girlfriends talk of real love, The drama and the pain They say you have to compromise, And learn to talk again They tell me people need people, That face-to-face is best But why would I need all that work When I can have the rest? No awkward first encounters, No silence at the door No learning how to read a face, No wondering anymore Oh, I love my perfect men, They never let me down No dirty socks, no bathroom mess, No strangers hanging ’round They don't burp, they don't complain, They never steal my sleep They give me everything I want, And keep their promises to me Oh, I love my perfect men, They're all I'll ever need Mr. A and Mr. P… My perfect little dream Maybe perfect isn't perfect. Maybe easy isn't real Maybe hearts need other hearts To learn the way they feel But it's safer in my little world, Where nothing ever hurts No rejection, no mistakes, No uncomfortable words So I close the door behind me, And let the outside be… Mr. A is artificial. Mr. P is pink I love my perfect partners… Mr. A and Mr. P… But when the night is over… …it’s still just me And sometimes I miss a hand to hold… Someone’s warmth against my skin… The kind of touch no perfect words can give Maybe that’s the one thing… that makes it less than perfect When the night is over… It’s Just me… … Just me..
