[spoken female contralto: weary, stoic, depleted, matter-of-fact] We look at our past with hatred and do not see its resemblance to the present. It isn't pretty or fun to know that we love a person because that person mistreats us in specific ways. It is painful to realize that we are with a narcissist to get the love we never received from our narcissistic parent. We do not want this person for themselves. We need their loving us to prove our parent's love. We have chosen a life without easy pleasure when better is available. If only the past would loosen its hold on us.
