Holiday Fear

[Intro] [Whispered] On the first day of Christmas Santa strikes fear straight through me down to the core. On the second day of Christmas I lay awake dreading next year when he comes back for more. Ho ho ho horrified as shit... it's the most scariest time of the year. Santa Clause is comin' to town and I'm not ready for that holiday fear. [Verse 1] I wake up in a panic, cold sweat, I feel a haunting chill. Hear that jingle-jangle sound and my heart stands still. Neighbor hangin’ stockings while I’m hidin’ under covers for day's. ‘Cause last year I saw the holiday spirit and it was scary in so many ways. Well that could've just been me in the glare on my TV screen lookin' like a ghost. But that fear was certain but it was the beady lil Santa eyes I fear the most. [Hook] I’m terrified of Christmas, worst fuckin' day to be. Every ho ho ho is horror to my ears scarin' me entirely! Keep your presents and skip me with all that cheer. I’m hidin’ terrified he'll find me, it's my holiday fear! [Verse 2] He has claws on both his paws and spiders weavin' tinsel through his beard. I got a different kind of fear that night and it made me cry kinda weird. Candy cane lookin’ shark teeth like his freaky ass grill can kill if not his stench will. And his pointy long tongue lickin' his lips instantly made my bladder spill. For real. He’s fat as fuck — I wonder how many kids he eats each week. He’s pickin’ clean some baby bones right now as we speak. His odor is definitely the worst a nose can endure — the stench was pure — I can only describe as that of sour rotting meat I think there's a dead elf in one of his creases cause beneath I see his lil feet. [Hook] I’m terrified of Christmas, worst fuckin' day to be. Every ho ho ho is horror to my ears scarin' me entirely! Keep your presents and skip me with all that cheer. I’m hidin’ terrified he'll find me, it's that time of year I've got that holiday fear! [Verse 3] He was horrible I must confess but what horrors reside inside his bag was anyone's guess. I have a few ideas but it's too unsettling to say but I stay terrified nonetheless. When I locked eyes with his before his locked on mine and I looked down. Blood around his mouth, frostbit tip on his nose, dark sunken eyes like a fat ass Christmas clown. Panic ensued so I ran tried to hide, is he still there, went to check...—...yep. I sat there as I wept but I gotta go just so scared he'd here each step. I try not to recall all the ways my terror blossomed into the beast chasing me nowadays. Fuck man, in my head the memory plays I'm fixin' to cry y'all my eyes start to glaze. He left after that but left us a present wrapped in tattooed hairy skin. Inside our evil lil kitten that's now living freely an embodiment of my fear within. [Hook - Outro] I’m terrified of Christmas, worst fuckin' day to be. Every ho ho ho is horror to my ears scarin' me entirely! Keep your presents and skip me with all that cheer. I’m hidin’ terrified he'll find me, it's my holiday fear! Santa ain't a good guy in my eyes something born in the depths of Satan's pit. Just know this Christmas I got that holiday fear and pants plum full of shit. Pops said when I was a boy ol' Saint Nick isn't one of us real guys but tell that to the fear in my eyes. I may be a bitch but I'm not a fool he can't get inside but every year he always tries. Block off the chimney, board up all the doors, plywood over windows, I do this every year. Ain't no chance he'll get in but it doesn't take away any lil bit of my seasonal fear. I’m terrified of Christmas y'all it's not that fuckin' tough to tell? Deck the halls all you want but I'm still scared dreading this Yuletide hell. 'Tis that special time of the year when Santa comes to kill, caroling as he slays. Hunker down somewhere safe hoping I can make it through these horrid holidays. [Sleigh bells ringing and Santa howling "ho ho ho" fading to silence]