why?

sometimes words just wont suffice so i rip my heart right out my chest sometimes the sky bleeds red so i suffocate my dread sometimes i see nothing at all so i claw my eyes out of my head sometimes the air is still and stale so i decide to vomit out my breath sometimes i don't know how to weigh my life or how to balance out the scales and sometimes a wrecking ball destroys the pillars that support the lies so why? why shed the tears you cry? why get outta bed, stay still and dead don't want to steal more time. so why? why hold back your sigh? snuff the spark, and shiver instead crawl back to the hole and make your bed before i forget what's on my mind forget what's left in these hands of mine forgotten more than i have ever known it is myself that i refuse to show made of clay and hallowed out made of paper like my crown made of steel I'm tempered now only made of what has been allowed through beaten weary bones deciphering all the tomes the pandemic as it spreads subsumes this tiny life I've led walked the shadows and the light on the razors edge is where i fight one step over left or right end of the day, and start of the night so why? why shed the tears you cry? why get outta bed, stay still and dead don't want to steal more time. so why? why hold back your sigh? snuff the spark, and shiver instead crawl back to the hole and make your bed