The Evil Dogs - Your Boyfriend’s Got a Laminator

He's got a laminator! He's got a laminator! You could've had me! Saw you Sunday buying plants. He had pockets in his sensible pants. Carried the bags, remembered your tea. An absolute bastard, obviously. He's got a shed and a steady wage. Keeps the receipts on a separate page. I said, "Sounds boring." You said, "It's nice." I went home and checked your pictures twice. He's got his name on the wheelie bin. He's got a house you can stand up in. I've got opinions. You've heard them all. He's got shelves that stay on the wall. Your boyfriend's got a laminator! He's got a laminator! You could've had me! I could've made you a mixtape. He made the menu wipe-clean. Your boyfriend's got a laminator! Look at him, preserving paper! I don't see what you see. Your boyfriend's got a laminator. You could've had me! He shook my hand and bought a round. Listened when I talked too loud. Laughed at my joke. Remembered my name. Now I can't even hate him. Shame. I tried to catch him being a prick. He fixed the door where it used to stick. You didn't ask. He noticed the scrape. I fixed that once. With loads of tape. He's got a level. He's got a drill. He says he'll do things. And then he will. I've got a jacket you used to steal. He asks you how you actually feel. Your boyfriend's got a laminator! He's got a laminator! You could've had me! I could've made you a mixtape. He made the menu wipe-clean. Your boyfriend's got a laminator! Look at him, preserving paper! I don't see what you see. Your boyfriend's got a laminator. You could've had me! Heat it up! Press it flat! What the hell Is sexy about that? Heat it up! Seal it tight! Bet he puts it Away at night! You had me. That's the thing. You had me waiting For the phone to ring. You had my coat Across your chair. You had my word. I wasn't there. He's got a photo You gave him in June. Just you, laughing, In your old front room. He keeps it safe From the damp and the rain. I think I get it. I hate that I get it. Still a stupid bloody thing! Still a stupid bloody thing! Your boyfriend's got a laminator! He's got a laminator! You could've had me! You did, and I was always busy. He's free when he says he'll be. Your boyfriend's got a laminator! Look at him, preserving paper! I can see what you see. Your boyfriend's got a laminator. It's not really about the machine. Heat it up! Press it flat! What the hell Am I meant to do with that? He's got a laminator! He's got a laminator! I bet it comes with a guarantee.