[TITLE: EVERYTHING’S FUNNY TILL IT ISN’T] [ARTIST: Earthling — featuring The Funny Dork] [GENRE: Carnival Grunge • Mutant Waltz • Sludge Cabaret • Corrupted Fairy Tale] [STYLE: Crooked three-beat carnival organ colliding with drop-D grunge • woozy bass • floor-tom stomp • cheap cymbal crashes • sarcastic male vocal with exaggerated showman delivery • canned laughter gradually warps into coughing and silence • Snow refuses to laugh at the dishonest jokes • bridge strips away the performance • final chorus keeps the humor but removes the disguise] [TEMPO: 96 BPM in 6/8 → 118 BPM grunge eruption] [KEY: E Minor] [MOOD: Hilarious • Manic • Uncomfortable • Lonely • Honest • Defiantly alive] [INTRO — BROKEN CARNIVAL ORGAN] [canned applause] [spoken like a master of ceremonies] Ladies, gentlemen, woodland creatures and emotionally unavailable royalty— I’ll be here all week. Unfortunately. [drum crash] [VERSE 1 — CROOKED WALTZ] I slipped upon a feeling, so I turned it to a bit. Everybody laughed so hard they never noticed it. I wore my grief like trousers three ridiculous sizes wide. If sorrow couldn’t catch me— it was laughing at my side. Snow sat silent at the table while the whole room shook with glee. I said, “What’s wrong, Your Highness? You too enlightened to laugh at me?” She said, “No, the joke was funny. I’m just wondering if you’re all right.” [spoken] And there she goes— ruining a perfectly good night. [CHORUS — GRUNGE EXPLOSION] EVERYTHING’S FUNNY TILL IT ISN’T! Till the laughter leaves and the truth walks in. I can make a joke from the shape I’m in— Everything’s funny, everything’s funny, till it isn’t. [VERSE 2 — BASS DISTORTION GROWS] I’ve got material on abandonment, a killer bit on shame. Ten strong minutes about fathers who forget their children’s names. I do voices for my failures. I give heartbreak funny hats. I call loneliness “independence”— people really love that. Snow said, “Humor is a lantern. Why keep aiming yours away?” I said, “Nobody buys a ticket to hear what lanterns have to say.” She said, “Maybe they’re not laughing because you’ve made the darkness small. Maybe they’re laughing so you’ll know you don’t have to hold it all.” [spoken, unsettled] That is not how comedy works. [pause] Is it? [CHORUS — LOUDER] EVERYTHING’S FUNNY TILL IT ISN’T! Till the grin gets tired and the mask wears thin. I can make you laugh so you won’t come in— Everything’s funny, everything’s funny, till it isn’t. [BREAKDOWN — CARNIVAL MUSIC MELTS] [canned laughter slows unnaturally] Ha… ha… ha… [complete silence] [BRIDGE — BARE VOCAL AND ACOUSTIC GUITAR] The truth is— I learned laughter could change the temperature of a room. Could make an angry man unclench. Could buy a frightened child some time. Could turn a blade sideways before it reached the skin. Laughter saved me. [pause] But sometimes I keep pulling the fire alarm long after the fire is gone. Sometimes the joke is just a doorbell— and I’m hiding when you answer. [Snow, softly] That was good. [spoken] It wasn’t a joke. [Snow] I know. [FINAL CHORUS — MELODIC, MASSIVE] EVERYTHING’S FUNNY— AND IT ISN’T! There is sorrow in the laughter. There is medicine in the grin. I don’t have to kill the darkness just to let somebody in. I can tell you something honest. I can laugh and still admit— Some things are funny because they hurt, and some things hurt— [band stops] because they did. [FINAL REFRAIN — CROOKED JOY] So laugh when laughter finds you. Cry when crying fits. Life is far too strange for either one to carry all of it. Everything’s funny. Everything’s broken. Everything’s trying to live. And if the joke opens the doorway— maybe laughter has something to give. [OUTRO — SMALL APPLAUSE] [spoken] Snow? Why did the Dork cross the kingdom? [Snow] Why? To avoid a meaningful conversation. [pause] I was going to say “discount ale.” [Snow laughs] [quietly] Still got it. [broken organ plays final chord]
