[Vocal style: Powerful baritone, battle-hardened] [Instrument: Heavy guitar, war drums, brass horns] [Mood: Epic, absurd, triumphant] [Verse 1] From the frozen northern tundra he emerges through the mist Ten feet of pure destruction with a rack you can't resist His hooves shake the earth like thunder, his eyes burn cold as steel Ed is charging into battle and he's never gonna yield [Pre-Chorus] Generals fear his antlers Tanks just turn and run Ed's been to every warzone Since before the world begun [Chorus] ED THE WAR MOOSE — trampling through the trenches ED THE WAR MOOSE — snapping every fence ED THE WAR MOOSE — no one comprehends it ED THE WAR MOOSE — makes no bloody sense [Verse 2] He survived ten thousand winters and a thousand wars before He doesn't fight for glory — it's just Ed being Ed at core The sound of distant rifles and the smell of battle smoke He'll charge a whole battalion and he won't even choke [Pre-Chorus] Medals round his antlers Scars across his hide Every army's wanted Ed But no one's ever tried [Chorus] ED THE WAR MOOSE — trampling through the trenches ED THE WAR MOOSE — snapping every fence ED THE WAR MOOSE — no one comprehends it ED THE WAR MOOSE — makes no bloody sense [Bridge] He doesn't need a general He doesn't need a plan He doesn't need a uniform Or the approval of a man He just needs open battlefield And enemies to find Ed the War Moose will not stop Until he's left it all behind [Guitar Solo — blistering, cinematic] [Final Chorus — double time, wall of sound] ED THE WAR MOOSE — trampling through the trenches ED THE WAR MOOSE — snapping every fence ED THE WAR MOOSE — no one comprehends it ED THE WAR MOOSE — makes no bloody sense ED THE WAR MOOSE — legend of the ages ED THE WAR MOOSE — filling history's pages ED THE WAR MOOSE — hooves against the gravel ED THE WAR MOOSE — mystery unravelled [Outro] Ed will return... when the north calls again... *distant hoofbeats fade into the tundra*
