2119 - My Eyes Have Seen The Glory Of A Hundred Nightmares

[Intro] [ad-libbing] [Chorus] My eyes have seen the glory of a hundred nightmares And my ears have heard the wailing of a thousand lonesome prayers I have done the deed I have lived in need I have crawled on my belly through the swamp of my despair And I have always found that I am never there [Verse 1] I was born by Caesarian section Which If you ask me Was a step in the wrong direction Because if God had wanted us to enter the world that way He would have put zippers on our mothers' bellies So they could open up like luggage and out we'd pop But that's not how it works You see Babies are meant to enter the world by coming through the water But You see I was so special I didn't even have to come through the water I just showed up And I think that In and of itself Is a huge mistake Because people who show up Like when you show up to a party or you show up to a meeting You show up with no investment You have nothing in it You're not losing anything And you're not winning anything You just show up And that's what happened to me I just showed up But the one good thing about that is that My head didn't get all squeezed up and funky-lookin' You know how some babies have those big old wrinkly heads 'Cause they've been squeezed out? I didn't get squeezed out I just showed up And you can look at my head and you can see it's perfectly shaped My head is perfectly shaped But the truth of the matter is I got this pain in my neck that goes all the way down to my shoulders And that's from carrying my head all these years And I have seen it all [Chorus] My eyes have seen the glory of a hundred nightmares And my ears have heard the wailing of a thousand lonesome prayers I have done the deed I have lived in need I have crawled on my belly through the swamp of my despair And I have always found that I am never there [Verse 2] You know In my lifetime I have tried every type of pleasure that you can imagine I have had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of some of the finest gentlemen on the face of this Earth I've met some of the finest men on this planet Some of the most spiritual men on this planet Some of the most intelligent men on this planet And it didn't work out (I have made the acquaintance of some of the finest women on the face of this Earth) (Some of the finest women on the face of this Earth) Some of the most beautiful women on the face of this Earth Some of the most intelligent women on the face of this Earth And it didn't work out And when I think about the number of times that I've made love You know All the times I've had sex All the orgasms I've had And you know Sex is a wonderful thing (It can be so fulfilling) But You know There's some sex you have that's just plain funny And when I think about all the funny sex I've had And I think about the serious sex I've had And then I think about the spiritual sex I've had And then I think about the downright dirty Dirty sex that I've had And I think about all the sex I've had And I think about all the orgasms I've had And you know There are some people who have had more sex than I have But I'm telling you There is nobody on this planet who has had more orgasms than I have And if I were to take all of my orgasms and stack them up They would be as high as Mount Everest (And as wide as the Grand Canyon And I still got a pain in my neck that goes all the way down to my shoulders) And that's from carrying my head all these years And I have seen it all [Chorus] My eyes have seen the glory of a hundred nightmares And my ears have heard the wailing of a thousand lonesome prayers I have done the deed I have lived in need I have crawled on my belly through the swamp of my despair And I have always found that I am never there